Exploring Mail Order Brides: A Solution to Modern Loneliness

Lauren Welch
Foreign wife finder
8 min readJan 15, 2024

Discover how mail order brides offer a unique perspective on combating modern loneliness. Explore cross-cultural connections and the legal aspects of international dating.

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Loneliness, Mail Order Brides, and Finding Love Across Borders

Loneliness is on the rise, and it’s a real bummer in today’s world. We’re all hooked up to the internet, but somehow, we’re feeling more disconnected than ever. But guess what? We’re about to dive into something interesting here — mail order brides. Yeah, you heard me right. It might sound like a blast from the past, but we’re gonna see if this old-school gig can help with our modern-day loneliness problem. Grab a seat, and let’s get cozy while we talk about the loneliness of American men and mail order wives. It’s gonna be a wild ride!

The loneliness epidemic is real

Let’s talk real here — American men are dealing with a loneliness problem. Despite the whole “tough guy” image, plenty of dudes are quietly battling that feeling of being all alone. There’s this old-school idea that guys should keep their emotions locked up. Plus, our fast-paced, digital world doesn’t always make it easy to connect face-to-face. We’re swiping right, but are we really making meaningful connections?

And here’s the kicker — loneliness isn’t just an emotional downer. It’s like a domino effect. It can bring on extra stress, a sense of gloom, and even mess with how satisfied we feel about life in general.

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Bottom line? American men are facing loneliness head-on, and it’s time we talked about it, dropped the stereotypes, and found ways to create those meaningful connections we all crave. This is where the concept of a mail order wife comes into play.

Do mail order brides still exist?

In the past, straight men from remote areas like Alaska or the frontier had too few women to court and marry. They solved this problem by browsing through brides for marriage catalogs featuring women from other parts of the country who were ready to start communication and eventually get married. It was a socially accepted and practical way of getting a spouse.

Today, things are quite similar, but with a modern twist and on a greater scale. Despite all the fear-mongering on Reddit and Quora, mail order spouses are real for sure. Women from all over the world sign up for specialized sites and meet men online, hoping to start a relationship and potentially get married to someone from the US, Canada, or other Western countries.

Although this may seem weird, and the name of the term sounds like it implies that you’re making a purchase, it has nothing to do with human trafficking. It’s just a niche type of dating — it brings together people from different parts of the world who want to get married. Given that the dating industry comes up with services for the most obscure demographics, like a dating app for people with herpes, it’s not that unusual.

Real mail order brides are regular women who make a decision to look for a foreign husband. They do this willingly, and they are just users of international dating sites.

Why an overseas bride is different from a local woman?

Why opt for women from other countries if you can meet plenty of potential wives in your city? Let’s discuss this in detail.

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Before we begin, I’d like to emphasize that people are people, no matter where they’re from. Trying to label one group as better for dating isn’t really fair because everyone’s different. What might make one group more appealing depends on your own personal tastes and what you’re looking for in a relationship.

Mail order women can be interesting because they come from various cultural backgrounds, which can make things exciting if you’re into learning about different traditions. Some people think foreign brides might be more focused on marriage and family life, while American women often have a wide range of life goals. This is true, but not because Ukrainian ladies are somehow more family-oriented than Americans. It’s just that on a mail order brides site you gain access to a pool of women who’re specifically interested in finding a husband. Unlike random girls on Tinder, they are ready for a commitment and starting a family. You can find dating services like this for people in the US, but those are typically for religious communities.

Sure, there can be language barriers when dating someone from another country, but hey, overcoming those challenges can actually bring you closer together. And some folks might find it attractive that a foreign bride has more traditional views on gender roles and family life.

But remember, the key to a successful relationship is finding someone who clicks with you, no matter where they’re from. So, keep an open mind, focus on shared values and respect, and you’ll find the right person for you, no labels needed.

Are mail order brides legal?

Your internet bride is just a woman you met on a dating site and not a purchase. It’s absolutely legal to marry someone from another country, but there are some nuances. After moving to the US, foreign wives automatically put themselves in a vulnerable position.Their husbands may abuse them, threaten to send them back to their home countries, and turn their lives into a nightmare.

This is why this practice is regulated by law. Immigrant women are protected by the Violence Against Women Act, which obliges law enforcement to prosecute rapists and abusers and provides victims with access to resources that help them to report abuse and get legal and medical support. They can reach out to the police without fearing deportation, which is often used as a leverage against them by abusers.

Also, the safety of a mail order spouse is protected by the International Marriage Broker Regulation Act, which was specifically designed to reduce the risk for foreigners who marry US citizens. Marriage agencies are required to inform women about grooms’ criminal history, including cases of domestic violence, sexual assault, and child abuse. Any American who wants a mail order girlfriend must consent to backround checks to prove they’re not a predator looking for a victim. Also, IMBRA puts a limit on the number of K-1 visa petitions a person can file.

Bringing an international bride to the US is a legally recognized and regulated practice, but you should be ready to deal with all the bureaucracy.

How does a mail order bride work?

So, you’ve decided to go for it, what now? The first step is to register on a couple of mail order bride sites. It’s typically free, and you can take a look at all the features and prices before committing. Each service is different, but usually you should expect spending around $200–300 monthly on chatting with women, having video calls, and sending long-form letters. What’s different about places like this is the eagerness of female users to meet men. They are interested in meeting a husband, and they don’t beat around the bush. Expect being messaged and receiving likes. But the luxury of female attention isn’t free, of course. People who run these businesses understand this, hence the prevalence of paid features.

You will get to know dozens of women there, but will likely end up with one or two you like best. Communicate with them often — consistency is the key to online relationships. Ask them about their day, their life, how are things going in their country. Tell about your interests and personality. This isn’t Bumble, you’re unlikely to meet soon. Spend this time building a connection.

Beware of requests to send money! Grifters might bypass the verification process and take advantage of romantic men, especially older ones. Would you send money to a woman you’ve just met on Tinder or in a bar? Of course not. This rule is applicable to mail order bride sites as well. The women there have a laptop and internet access, they aren’t some hopeless damsels in distress who will starve without your $200.

After you feel like you know each other well enough and would like to meet in real life, it’s time for a trip! Typically, men travel to the homecountry of their online girlfriends because it’s cheaper and easier — around $3500 for a two-week trip.

Once you meet, it’s the moment of truth. Yes, you both may get disappointed. After all, chatting online is different that seeing the person with your own eyes and being near them. But the mail order marriage statistics shows that this kind of problem isn’t prevalent — each year, around 10,000 Americans tie the know with women from overseas.

Once you’ve established a connection, you may think about getting married. This doesn’t have to happen immediately after your first trip. Keep communicating, travel together, enjoy each other’s company. This isn’t different from developing a regular relationship. You must be sure that you’re ready to marry this woman.

If you’re ready to commit, start planning a wedding and the relocation process. After she comes to the US, she’ll need some time to adjust to the new country and community. It will be your responsibility to protect and support her. It may be costly and difficult, but this is how getting a mail order bride works.

Wrapping up

So, why mail order wives are a legit solution to the loneliness problem? Because these women are lonely as well, and they are actively looking for husbands, serious relationships, and stable family life. Sure, plenty of American women struggle with loneliness too, but they’re more culturally inclined to fight it in a different way, and it’s less common for them to seek a husband unless they’re religious.

But mail order spouses have an additional motivation to do so because it’s also a chance to start a new life in a different country without immigration alone. And this is completely legal! If you want to start a family but struggle to find a partner, look overseas, it may be the best decision of your life.

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