A Sound. With Music and Zombies

“The hills are alive…” Maria begins to sing, and she starts twirling. It’s a beautifully bright, sunny day in the mountains after all.

“Maria, Look out! Run!” the children scream in response.

Maria turns and looks behind her. Cresting the hill is a whole pack of them: walkers, the undead, zombies, whatever you want to call them.

It used to be so much easier in the old days when all Maria had to worry about was a handsome and horny widower, Nazis, or fighting the urge to turn curtains into outfits. Now she had zombies, too! It was a little hard to grasp. “Okay — let’s sing, but quietly”, she suggests. “Doe, a deer…”

“Oh for God’s sake. Please shut up and help us!” Brigitta shouts — or was that Marta? Maria really could never remember which was which.

“Help me!” Kurt — or was it Kirk — cries out, as one of the undead grabs at his floral print shirt sleeve.

‘One would think that a floral pattern would act as some kind of camouflage in the midst of mountain meadows’, Maria thinks distractedly to herself as she pulls out her trusty katana and swings. It makes a loud Thwack, Thwack. Then a Thunk, Thunk quickly follows as two grotesque, rotting heads are separated from their lederhosen-wearing putrefied bodies by the hungry, razor-sharp blade.

“Wow! Good one!” Liesl said.

“They didn’t just teach me creative ways to use upholstery fabric in nun school!” Maria shouts back, then immediately jumps back into song, “Speaking of — a needle pulling thread…come on!”

“Fa…a long, long way to run…” The children sing back, getting the song order a little mixed up in the confusion of the zombie-filled moment. They gather around Maria tightly — within the protective swing radius of their katana-wielding nanny — then all begin to run back towards the safety of their gated home.

As the last of the children run past the heavy metal gate, the Captain steps out from behind a nearby tree surprising them. The oldest of the boys, Freidrich, stops to slam the gate behind them, and it shuts with a loud bang.

Suddenly, there is a sound and another disheveled figure appears in the trees directly behind the Captain. There are leaves and twigs in its hair.

Maria still clutching her katana, jumps behind the Captain, assesses the danger, then swings her weapon. There is a loud thwack, followed by the familiar thunk as the grotesque head hits the ground. It rolls a couple of times, coming to a stop against the edge of the stunned Captain’s black boot.

“Oh my God, Maria! You just killed the Baroness!” There are a couple of screams from the children. Leisl faints.

Maria looks down at the blonde head, then back up to the Captain. She turns quickly and runs past the children, mumbling something as she goes.

“What did she say, Marta?” the Captain turns and asks his pig-tailed daughter as he watches Maria disappear into the distance.

“Not you, too! I’m Brigitta, Father!” Brigitta takes a moment to pout, but then adds,“I’m not sure! I heard her say something about raindrops on roses and something, something kittens…”