Writing is hard (is it?)

Sometimes I have a clear idea what to write about, but once I sit down and start writing I often don’t know how to continue after 2–3 sentences. When I experience this kind of writing blockage I start to wonder how others are able to write long articles with hundrets or even thousands of words.

I love writing but so far I haven’t been able to create longer articles without either being blocked or getting off subject along the lines.

Speaking is a totally different game for me. Let me talk and I can’t stop.

I wonder what the reason for this writing blockage could be?

One of my girlfriends, with whom I studied Russian literature, has always been very good at writing great stories about a given subject or her own observations. I remember how our teacher loved her for her writing, even she was hardly attending her classes on a regular basis.

My writing on the other hand was critisised as being the worst our teacher has ever seen. So embarrassing, seriously!

Even worst, that wasn’t the first time I got this kind of feedback on my writing. I remember back to when I was 12–13 years old when my teacher in secondary school called me out for my bad writing.

I believe that was the moment where I made the decision about myself, that I am bad at writing.

Even I knew that my writing was bad, I went to University to study Russian Literature (btw. Russian is my native language). Looking back I read an incredibale amount of books, but my writing hadn’t improved at all.

When I asked my mother what I liked to do the most when I was a small girl, she said that I was always reading books. I still LOVE reading :) But when I have always been loving to read, how can writing be so hard for me? Arn’t you suposed to get good at writing when you read a lot? At least that’s what I rememeber hearing all the time.

After reading “The Artist Way” by Julia Cameron and this article by James Clear, I recognised that I was blocking my inner artist (according to Julia, every person has an artist within) and the only thing missing for me to be a great writer has been to write.

During reading “The Artist Way” I started to consistently write at least 3 morning pages for 3 month which connected me to my inner voice and helped me to deepen my spiritual practice. The journaling was only for me, so nothing published, but I definitely experienced that the more I wrote the more the words were just flowing on to paper. Being honest, without this experience I don’t think I would be writing this post right now.

I have kept the practice of journaling more or less on a consistent bases since then, but now I want to make the next step and hit the publish button on my writing.

Nobody said that it’s going to be easy, especially at the beginning. I still have frustrating moments that often end in crying spells. My husband believes in me, supports me and thanks to him, I’m still writing. Believe me, I have many moments where I just say f*ck writing.

For those of you who desire to be good at writing or anything else, don’t be stopped by your disempowering inner voice. Keep writing or doing, and don’t give up.

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