Enhanced Communication
When it comes to efficient communication in the work place, we need to consider a different approach to the way we discuss with family, friends and acquaintances. In our personal circle, outside of human connections and socialization there is rarely something else to gain. As such, rules are loose, authenticity is welcomed and lack of agreement or alignment in opinions is acceptable.
In the workplace, while there might not be anything inherently wrong with this approach, the process itself might not be efficient and may not lead to expected or wanted results.
So, in order to optimize the communication and its expected outcome we can look at a set of rules that help us be efficient when communicating with our colleagues, supervisors or clients. Communication is defined as “the imparting or exchanging of information”, and it assumes that presence of at least a sender and a receiver of messages. During communication, the roles switch allowing for constant exchange of information.
To improve this process, we need to take into account three elements: Speaking, Listening and Questioning.
Speaking needs to be associated with a specific objective, achieved through the communication of a specific set of ideas. If you need to speak, then you already have established an objective in your mind and you are just following the normal interaction to complete your objective. If you are unsure of what you can achieve through speaking, you may very well not speak at all. Ambiguous and general topics of communication cannot produce any measurable or satisfying results.
Transmitting a message needs to follow the natural and logical flow of ideas, being expressed clearly and with the correct use of the language and its grammatical constraints. Starting to speak also means that you already have enough information for a constructive discussion. Avoid making assumptions or drawing conclusions, unless the intent is to communicate a decision or to ask for an opinion on an assumption.
When referring to yourself, your actions and your responsibilities use words like “make”, “get”, “done” and “correct” while avoiding negative terms like “try”, “mistake”, “impossible” and “can’t”.
When referring to others, their actions and their responsibilities use words like “collaborate”, “align”, “discuss”, “together” while avoiding negative terms like “tell”, “convince”, “fix”, and “responsible”. Also, make sure that any actions that refer to your team or your company would be communicated using plurals, like “we will” instead of “they will”.
When responding to a question use words like “understand”, “clear”, “sure” while avoiding “maybe”, “perhaps” and “we will see”. If you do not have a clear answer it is better to ask for time to get informed or simply state that you do not have the necessary information but you will get it from another colleague as soon as possible and get get back with a response.
Finally, if discussing a plan, idea or concept use words like “sure”, “confident”, “safe” while avoiding terms that may make people defensive like “issues”, “lose” or “risk”. This does not mean that you should avoid Risk Management, but the focus should be on solution sand preemptive processes, rather then all the things that can go wrong.
Words matter. Used incorrectly or at the wrong time they may convey a hidden message within the communication, may lead people to think of other things or worse, it may trigger emotional states within the other participants to the communication. Choose the words that are aligned with the message and the objective you want to achieve. Make sure you do a short summary of the transmitted ideas and ask for confirmation of what other people have understood from you message. If the context allows it, ask the other person to summarize their understanding of your message.
Listening is equally important. A leadership principle states that you should be the last one to talk, after you have gathered all the necessary information and you are sure you have the correct understanding of the situation. When other people talk, we should listen to their words, understand the message that they are trying to send and make sure we do not jump to conclusions.
It is sometimes difficult to focus on what other people are saying because along with processing their message our minds also have to do various thinking or decision processes. These may take away attention from the speaker. If you are having difficulty listening to others, an efficient trick is to repeat their words with your inner voice.
Listen and understand the message. Keep in mind, that exactly like you, any other person will have an objective for their communication. In order to figure out what the other person’s objectives are follow their “call to action”. Regardless of what they tell you, how they phrase it or the words they use, in the end the other person will ask you (suggest, recommend, propose, ask you to consider) to do something. That is their real objective of the communication. In order to improve your ability to respond ask for clarifications if it is not clear and proceed according to your best judgement in satisfying or denying the other person interests.
Finally, in communication we also need to ask questions. There are multiple types of questions each serving a specific purpose:
Open questions: do not imply a yes or no question and are used to gain more information.
Closed questions: imply and yes or no answer and are used as summary or testing your understanding.
Funnel questions: which move the communication from general to concrete in order to clarify things.
Probing questions: explicitly starting with an assumption in order to test it.
Leading questions: adding enough detail to lead the discussion towards a point of interest.
Rhetorical questions: action more like statement either to disprove information or to challenge decisions. Can also be used to make a point but may be seen as sarcasm.
Clarifying questions: clearly request specific information to clarify a specific topic.
Aside from these, a special type of question, provides an efficient tool in communication. I am referring to the “Powerful Questions” technique. This practice can help transform invasive or aggressive questions into constructive ones by using the following rules:
Avoid using “why”, “when” and “where” which limit the answer.
Try using “how” and “what” which enrich the answer and favor personal contribution to the answer (“Why are we not more… “ vs “How can we be more …”)
Enhance the scope of your question to the outer limits (“How can our team….” vs “How do all successful teams”)
Explore assumptions (“How can we deliver faster…” vs “What do our customer want most”)
Have fun communicating efficiently!
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