Why Women Aren’t Trash…
I log onto twitter this morning and the first thing I notice is that #WomenAreTrash trending. Now I am aware yesterday there was #MenAreTrash trending, but let me take a second to roll my eyes at the men clapping back. The problem here is that these twirra bois (I can’t in good conscience call you MEN) want to make light of the life experience and the long standing dynamic between men and women. You want to ignore that there is male privilege, patriarchy rules the world and that you have long mistreated us.
You want to act like Donald Trump didn’t just make light of sexual assault and didn’t high five misogyny! You want us to pretend Kelly Oxford didn’t start a whole conversation #notokay where millions of women shared their FIRST sexual assault experience, yes FIRST not their only!!!
You are tweeting that women are trash because they won’t give it up, they are loud mouth side chicks, they ask for money, they nag and whine, they lie about pregnancies, they cheated on you or they gave you an STD.
We are tweeting men are trash because since the age of 5 (possibly younger) most of us have encountered different forms of sexual assault, because we can’t walk down the street without being harassed, because we live in constant fear of being assaulted or taken advantage of…we have to worry about our safety and our bodies. But sure guys, “women are trash…” GTFOH.
Some highlights of my personal experience and bear in mind this is like 45% of what I have gone through personally there are some things I don’t even want to share because emotions!:
Age 5: Farm worker touched my vagina while I was sitting in garage playing thankfully my cousin walked in and chased him away.
Age 12: An older group of boys chase me home on their bikes screaming profanities at me and trying to grab at my dress.
Age 13: a boy chased me and lifted up my skirt at school
Age 14: Boys would slap my ass as I walked past them at school
Age 15: A guy called me a slut because I wouldn’t let him grab my breasts
Age 16: A guy tried to get me drunk to take advantage of me
Age 17: A boyfriend broke up with me because I refused to have sex with him after he locked me in a room with him.
Age 18: A guy spat in my face when I refused to allow him to grope me in public.
Age 23: My friend was grabbed by her vagina on the dance floor of a club by a professional Rugby Player.
Ages 25–29: Men at work make inappropriate sexual comments towards me, sometimes causing me to feel depressed and suffer anxiety and not want to go into work.
…… I can keep going but….
Present day: I’ve been grabbed and pulled onto someone’s lap at a bar, I have been followed to the bathroom, to my car, to my home all by men I don’t know. I’ve been slipped the date rape drug and thankfully had friends look after me and take me home. I’ve had people lie about sleeping with me just because I wouldn’t sleep with them. I am 31 and this is what is still going on! Did I mention I saw a woman get the shit beat out of her just the other day when I was driving down the road…Don’t come tell me that “not all men…” blah blah. Some of these people are your fathers, brothers, uncles, sons and boyfriends.
Thankfully I am as an adult able to defend myself both physically and with my words, even though I shouldn’t have to. I should not have to rebuff unwanted advances and the physical touch of strangers. I shouldn’t even have to feel like maybe I can’t confront this guy because he is bigger than me and may hurt me physically for telling him to take a long walk off a short cliff.
So please twirra bois tell me more about how women are trash, clearly we are ALL the street harassers, sex offenders, rapists and the main ones perpetrating gender based violence….oh wait that’s not the case? That’s what I thought.
#PSA
