lunch with lee(THE POSTMAN ALWAYS LIES TWICE)

Today’s Menu: Does this package contain anything hazardous, dangerous…

My family is at it again. And as always I’m bound by family honor to change the name to protect the innocent, guilty or in this case, the guillible.

My niece, let’s call her Daisy. This is her story.

An everyday encounter at the post office. That’s how it all began. A long smoldering look across the counter while purchasing stamps. But she wasn’t interested. Tossing her hair back from her eyes when the clerk asked if he could help her in any way. But she wasn’t really interested. She started finding reasons to stop by the post office EVERYDAY. Mind you, Daisy lives in a small city but not so small that there’s only one post office. There was flirtation going on. So much so that Daisy inquired about a wife and or a girlfriend. He had neither. My poor unsuspecting niece.

The wife and her friends shows up at Daisy’s place of work, hurling accusations. What do you call it when the postman’s wife goes postal? To make matters worse, instead of trying to explain the situation like any sane, innocent person would do…my niece decides to call the postman aka the husband. Question for you? Why do she have the mailman’s personal number? Oh, Daisy.

Fast-forward: Two months later. Same post office. Same Daisy. She’s standing in line. She avoids the married clerk. Why not avoid that post office? Just a thought. But I digress. According to Daisy, another clerk is flirting with her. Has been on a regular basis now. Daisy, Daisy, Daisy. Will you ever learn? He’s leaning on the counter, laughing, talking, and then nothing. Daisy turns, looking to see what has his attention. It’s not what but who. A woman. A not too friendly looking woman. The wife or girlfriend?

At this point, Daisy is thinking to herself, does it really matter? Deju vu- all over again.

Maybe Daisy should try UPS OR FED-EX.