Rectifying Today For Tomorrow
#1. It’s Concerning How Similar Toxic Masculinity And Traditional Masculinity Are; A Comparison
Edit: I didn’t think to tell you to follow me here, but you should. This is one of many articles in the “Rectifying Today For Tomorrow” series. This is a journey to help people get to a solid understanding of what we’re really facing right now. Topics of this series include defining masculinity as it should have always been, helping men understand what women face from birth, how to reverse misogynistic thinking, how to protect boys from being influenced by misogyny, how to proactively guard against future misogynistic influencers from taking the stage, teach men how to lovingly talk to and care for each other, and any other defensive-type article that helps the world become better for our children.
Newly added information (07/04/2023):
Our wonderful 90 year old psychologist advisor Joyce (you can meet her here) has suggested that I define “misogyny” because many probably don’t know what it truly is. So I will do that now:
Misogyny is a word used to describe a way of thinking or behaving that shows a dislike, prejudice, or unfair treatment towards girls and women, simply because they are girls or women. It means not treating girls and women with the same respect, kindness, and fairness as boys and men. Misogyny can show up in different forms, such as making mean jokes about girls, believing that boys are always better than girls, or thinking that girls should only do certain things and not others. It’s important to remember that everyone deserves to be treated equally and with respect, regardless of their gender.
Now that we are all on the same with what misogyny is, let’s get on with this comparison.
Toxic masculinity and traditional masculinity are two concepts related to societal expectations and norms regarding male behavior and gender roles. While they share some similarities, they also have distinct differences. Let's examine each concept separately and then compare them.
Traditional Masculinity:
Traditional masculinity refers to the set of norms, values, and behaviors historically associated with men in many societies. It encompasses characteristics such as strength, assertiveness, self-reliance, courage, and the ability to protect and provide for one's family. Traditional masculinity often promotes qualities like competitiveness, independence, emotional restraint, and stoicism. It has been ingrained in various cultural and social institutions, shaping expectations for men's roles in areas such as work, relationships, and personal identity.
Toxic Masculinity:
Toxic masculinity refers to a harmful manifestation of traditional masculinity that emphasizes aggressive, dominant, and destructive behaviors. It is characterized by an adherence to rigid gender roles and the suppression of emotions. Toxic masculinity perpetuates harmful stereotypes and behaviors, such as the suppression of vulnerability, the objectification of women, homophobia, sexism, and violence. It can lead to a range of negative consequences for both men and women, including mental health issues, strained relationships, and societal inequalities.
Comparison:
1. Norms and Expectations: Traditional masculinity encompasses a broader set of expectations and values, while toxic masculinity represents an extreme and harmful version of those expectations.
2. Emotional Expression: Traditional masculinity often encourages emotional restraint and the suppression of vulnerable emotions, while toxic masculinity takes it to an unhealthy extreme, stigmatizing any form of emotional expression as a sign of weakness.
3. Impact on Individuals: Traditional masculinity can create pressure on men to conform to societal expectations, but it does not necessarily lead to harm. Toxic masculinity, on the other hand, promotes harmful behaviors and attitudes that can negatively impact both men and women.
4. Impact on Society: Traditional masculinity has shaped societies for centuries and has influenced various aspects of culture, work, and relationships. Toxic masculinity, as a harmful subset, perpetuates gender inequalities, discrimination, and violence.
5. Power and Dominance: Traditional masculinity often emphasizes power and dominance as desirable qualities, particularly in the realms of work, relationships, and social interactions. Toxic masculinity takes this emphasis to an extreme, promoting aggressive and domineering behavior as the only acceptable expression of masculinity. This can lead to the objectification and mistreatment of others, especially women.
6. Attitudes towards Women: Traditional masculinity, while not inherently toxic, has historically contributed to gender inequalities and the objectification of women. However, toxic masculinity perpetuates harmful attitudes and behaviors towards women, such as sexual harassment, misogyny, and the belief in male entitlement over women's bodies and autonomy.
7. Homophobia and Homophobic Behavior: Traditional masculinity has often stigmatized non-conforming gender and sexual identities, including homosexuality. Toxic masculinity exacerbates this by promoting homophobic attitudes, discrimination, and violence towards individuals who do not conform to traditional gender roles or heteronormativity.
8. Mental Health and Emotional Well-being: Traditional masculinity can create pressures for men to suppress their emotions and seek self-reliance, which can have negative impacts on their mental health. Toxic masculinity further exacerbates this by stigmatizing seeking help, discussing emotions, or seeking therapy as signs of weakness, leading to higher rates of mental health issues such as depression and suicide among men.
9. Relationship Dynamics: Traditional masculinity often promotes the idea of men as the primary providers and protectors within relationships. While this can be a positive aspect of traditional masculinity, toxic masculinity can manifest in controlling and abusive behaviors, such as dominance, possessiveness, and the belief in male superiority, which undermine healthy relationship dynamics and contribute to intimate partner violence.
10. Peer Pressure and Conformity: Traditional masculinity can create pressure on men to conform to societal expectations and fit into prescribed gender roles. This pressure may lead to men feeling compelled to adhere strictly to traditional masculine norms. Toxic masculinity exacerbates this pressure by promoting rigid and narrow definitions of masculinity, leaving little room for individual expression or deviation from the norm.
11. Intersectionality: Both traditional masculinity and toxic masculinity can intersect with other social identities, such as race, class, and sexuality. Intersectionality recognizes that experiences of masculinity vary depending on these intersecting identities. For instance, certain communities or cultural contexts may have different expectations of masculinity that can influence the expression of traditional or toxic masculine traits.
12. Effects on Men: Traditional masculinity can have positive effects on men's self-esteem and identity when it aligns with their personal values and aspirations. However, toxic masculinity can lead to harmful consequences for men, such as rigid gender roles limiting their emotional expression, difficulty seeking help or support, and higher rates of substance abuse or risk-taking behavior as a way to prove their masculinity.
13. Effects on Boys and Adolescents: Traditional masculinity can shape the upbringing and socialization of boys, often emphasizing toughness, competitiveness, and independence. This can influence their self-perception, relationships, and behavior. Toxic masculinity, on the other hand, can negatively impact boys and adolescents by reinforcing harmful stereotypes, encouraging bullying, and fostering hostile or aggressive attitudes towards others.
14. Shifts in Gender Norms: As societies progress, there is an increasing recognition of the need to challenge and redefine traditional gender norms, including masculinity. This shift aims to promote inclusivity, gender equality, and a broader range of acceptable expressions of masculinity that embrace empathy, emotional intelligence, and cooperation.
These are just a few of the comparisons for you to consider. There are many men that are wanting traditional masculinity to come back, but traditional masculinity doesn’t provide any benefit for this world either. We need to move towards healthy positive masculinity as soon as possible.
I started https://www.reddit.com/r/GuyCry so as to take the lead in the promotion of healthy masculinity. Within 60 days of its founding we had 35,000 members. What’s important about that is that other people see the great need for such a change. Plus we’re preventing suicide and helping relationships become better. These are things that matter the most.
Now we’re working on getting in-person group meetings begun; these meetings are called “Legacies of Men." We’re still compiling the program, but we have the venue and we have the structure, we also have our entry and exit surveys, and are a fiscally sponsored nonprofit. Our pilot study is almost prepared.
As we continue to break down the societal norms, and as we continue to attack the misogynistic titans at the top, we will begin to unburden men’s lives soon enough, and healthy masculinity will start to replace all other types of masculinity. It is sorely needed and we are working our butts off to make sure it comes about.
Thank you for reading this. I hope you thoroughly examine GuyCry because we are being the change we want to see.
