I also agree with your husband. Doctors tend to be very busy, and there is no getting around long waits in many cases, but you shouldn’t be left hanging like that.
My wife, who is dealing with several major issues, is lucky to have a team of doctors who will pay attention to her. Even so, I’ve learned that precisely because they are so busy, a patient needs to be direct and up-front even with good doctors to make sure all questions and concerns are taken care of. If you don’t speak up, they may not realize they didn’t give you all the care and information you need, no matter how good they are.
This may be a problem for you because of your difficulty in speaking up. My wife sometimes has the same issue (although not to the degree you describe). We deal with it in two ways. First, she makes lists of questions and concerns she has, and takes them to her appointments so she can review them with the doctor. Second, I generally accompany her to her most important appointments so I can ask questions if necessary.
A few years back when she was in the hospital with her first bout of trouble, a nurse told me, “Don’t let the doctor leave without answering all of your questions. You’re paying them enough.” I’ve tried to take that to heart, especially where my wife is concerned. If you say, “I have some questions,” a good doctor will say, “Sure, what’s on your mind?” and will spend the time to answer no matter how long your list is.
Although, that means the other patients are waiting for them . . . which is why we just can’t win where wait times are concerned. We all want our doctors to get to us fast, but we don’t want them to rush when it’s our turn.