Mother F*ckin’ Hometowns
Nick’s hometown visits have left me more nervous than ever.
Warning: this post contains spoilers about “The Bachelor” 21x08.
Personally, it’s been a tough two weeks. My daughter brought hand, foot, and mouth disease home from daycare. If you don’t know what this disease looks like, don’t Google it with a full stomach. It’s disgusting. The virus lasts 7–10 days, and nearly a week after I caught it, my husband caught it.
We cancelled our Valentine’s Day date.
We cancelled our President’s Day trip to New York.
But it was going to take a hell of a lot more than a contagious skin infection to get us to cancel our special hometown dinner! We put our sweet little petri dish to bed, cooked crab cakes, seared ahi, and pasta, and stuffed our faces while ABC transported us to Hoxie, Dallas, Miami, and Montreal.
I know that hometown dates don’t always determine of the outcome of the Bachelor. A great hometown visit doesn’t necessarily mean the Bachelor will choose you, and a bad hometown visit doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be left rose-less. For instance, Sean Lowe’s visit to Catherine’s family in Seattle was quite tense, and they still got married. So, even though Corinne seemed to have a really good hometown, that doesn’t mean she’s going to take this thing home (right? please?).
The start of Corinne’s hometown date in Miami, FL was truly cringe-worthy. They met up AT A MALL, where Corinne was greeted like a returning war hero by all of the salespeople (who Corinne knew by name), and casually purchased Nick a $3,000 outfit because that’s a totally normal thing to do.
Corinne then took Nick home to meet her parents, sister, and the now-famous Raquel (Corinne’s nanny). Corinne’s parents, shocked that others would question why a grown woman has a nanny, explained that Raquel is just part of the family. Namely, the part of the family who does all of the cooking, cleaning, and chores.
I was pleased. Surely Nick, who was raised by church-going, corn-fed Midwesterners, must be having a hard time imagining how he fits in with this family who can’t seem to function without a live-in nanny and cook.
But then, Corinne and her dad had a heart-to-heart. And it was actually really sweet. And then Nick and Corinne’s dad had a heart-to-heart. And it was really sweet! Meeting Corinne’s family made me like her more, and I think Nick felt the same way.
Almost as good? Nick’s visit to meet Raven’s family in Hoxie, Alabama. After an off-roading date involving splashing around in swamp water, shudder, we met Raven’s family. Raven’s mom announced that Raven’s dad is cancer free, and Raven told her dad, in a private conversation, that if her dad hadn’t been able to walk her down the aisle at her wedding, she would have walked alone.
And America wept.
I like Raven a lot, and I found her family very sweet and endearing, but I didn’t feel closer to her at the end of the date. I’m sorry; I just didn’t!
Rachel’s hometown date in Dallas, Texas was entertaining. We got to watch Nick try to look comfortable at a predominantly Black church.
Good try, Nick! We also got to watch Rachel’s sister and brother-in-law grill Nick in a funny, well-meaning way. I was bummed that her dad, the federal judge, wasn’t there, because I really wanted to meet him. But I will just have to be patient.
Rachel’s sister and mom asked Nick some tough questions, but it somehow wasn’t awkward because you could tell that they were trying to remain open minded despite their concern for Rachel’s well being.
Since I know that Rachel, my frontrunnner, is going to be the next Bachelorette, I now want Vanessa to win. But Vanessa had the worst hometown date!!
Vanessa’s family interrogated Nick, but that wasn’t the problem. The problem was that their questions revealed the fact that Nick and Vanessa haven’t discussed A LOT of important issues, like where they would live next, or what Vanessa would do about her job, which she clearly loves and excels at.
If Nick and Vanessa’s lives are currently incompatible, can they make this work?! I’m concerned.
Nick’s head seemed to be spinning at the end of his date with Vanessa, but did you hear him tell her not to “get in her head” about the coming week? I’m hopeful that was Nick’s way of telling Vanessa that she’s good for the next rose ceremony, but given Vanessa’s anger at hearing that Nick had asked the other ladies’ fathers for permission to get engaged, it will be difficult for Vanessa to take Nick’s advice.
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