The Defining Moment of Total Surrender
Hey Friends,
I am aware that I owe you guys so much explanation for the fact that I went MIA especially after turning 23 in April — the truth is so much has happened and I can’t wait to break down with y’all!
I officially did a comeback interview at Cape Pulpit radio on 729 AM, and you can check it out just to catch up with me.
Friends, what brings me back so urgently is an encounter of Total Surrender!
As I write this — I am very vulnerable as this chat allows me to bring you guys into a sacred place in my life and it’s hard even trying to share but let me take you back a bit.
Earlier this year, I encountered a group, a movement called ‘The Jesus Collective’(all about Jesus) and they had a song titled ‘kuyenzeka’ — which basically means — ‘it is possible.
This song moved me greatly — at the time, I had no idea why but all I knew was it spoke to me, especially in the testimony of ‘Nothing is too hard for the Lord and for those who know my journey in the past year — you know what it means for me to testify of the Lord’s faithfulness.
At the beginning of the year after coming from the most horrible year of my life 2021 — The Lord said to me — It is your year of Restoration, Recovery, and Rest. Now, these guys announced their album launch and titled ‘RESTORED’ in August 2022, note that I didn’t have a relationship with them, and most of them still don’t know who I am. Yet, the God that spoke to me in private in Jan, spoke to them on RESTORED.
Anyway, I will unpack the deeper details on that some other day.
So friends, what does Total Surrender mean to you?
Let me tell you a short story — in the past year, I have cried in ways that I have never before, especially last year, I cried to the state of being suicidal, attacked, etc. Not everyone in my life knows this, especially my family.
Those that know me on social media — know a Brand that doesn’t cry or break even in public!
I have been in a public scene now for more than 10 years and never have I cried in public, I have always been that kid on the block that’s like me cry WHY? It’s so unnecessary I said!
Yet, last year man, I was so broken and destroyed that I cried and cried to sleep sometimes… lol you’re shocked, don’t be!
My state of not crying in general or not crying in public produced an individual that had this notion that he had to be strong at all times, lead and the show must go on!
So much had also happened in my past that being strong was the only option!
Now, What this actually produces is a hard heart — a heart that refuses or is not receptive to being completely vulnerable to the LORD.
One can surrender but might not completely surrender like a TOTAL SURRENDER especially when they felt like GOD had once forsaken them…
Hmm.. this is hard communicating…
Friends, on the 27th of June of 2021 — I was done with God and everything affiliated with Him. I am getting to a better place to talk more about everything last year… Be patient with me as the Lord guides I will speak and leave nothing hidden…
What does Total Surrender mean to me?
Total Surrender means a state of complete vulnerability and trust in a source of some sort.
To many that source could be their jobs, husbands, wives, etc.
But for me, I am talking about Jesus.
Friends, in the past year, I cried outside His presence, I cried in my own might and could justify that by saying it was the fear of being hurt again.
But something happened on the 25th of September 2022 — as I attended the Outreach of the Jesus Collective in Michelle’s Plain.
The worship was heavenly as per usual — His Presence was very present throughout but at a point of Mam Ntokozo Mbambo singing her song titled ‘We Bow’
Here is a link — perhaps listen to it so you can fully understand and experience what I am trying to explain.
There is a part in the song that says ‘So we lift up our hands in worship as your glory fills this temple…
Dear Friends, I heard the voice of the Lord say ’Son, you are safe in my Presence’ … I didn’t fully understand as like I know that already so what does He mean?
Mam Ntokozo moved to a song titled ‘Bow down and Worship Him’ oh boy… I understood what he meant from here
I found myself on my knees weeping heavily in tears, I had no control over them — all I wanted to do was worship Him.
He said ‘Son, in your journey of recovery — you don’t have to be strong towards me, it’s okay — you are safe to be fully vulnerable to me, I’m not the enemy here’
I then felt His hand on my back like how a Father rubs his child’s back and He said: ‘Let it out son, you have moved, you are now safe, walk into the new place — you are no longer in the trenches.
You don’t have to fight anymore. You are FREE.
He said: ‘You are now free to fully Experience me and Worship me. Let it all out and worship.
At this moment right there, I encountered total surrender and fully experienced His Love in a way that I never experienced before.
To this day, I am still processing what happened on that day.
Now, I can fully cry in His presence, and oh is the Jesus Collective album a blessing. I am so grateful to the Jesus Collective family and the Lord has spoken so much beautiful things about their movement! in fact, its not their movement, it’s HIS Movement!
Friends, take a moment to just close your eyes and Worship Him — He is not a religion but Jesus, a life bringer. If you are not familar:
Matthew 11:28–30 Message Translation
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me — watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”
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Friends, I would love to thank all those who follow my activities on socials and those who act on them. Yes, we have over 27k subscribers on our Unpack the Facts Network Youtube Channel and we have 5k followers on our Podcast network — we are working on growing our blog platforms and creating new life-changing content.
Thank you for listening to my story on THE DEFINING MOMENT OF TOTAL SURRENDER!
Till next time, I hope you are inspired yet if you have questions or comments on what you learned — go ahead! Have an amazing week ahead and friends, please join in sharing the blogs with your friends and family and build this community together.
Let’s also become friends on social media — follow me @kgotsohopelekau but also use #BeingRealwithKG
