How to Be Gay
You can say be yourself and be done with it. Or you can ask is this the right question, because there is no how about it if you’re gay, you just are. Maybe that’s why there is so little to say, and the less the better for most of us, gay or straight.
Still, gay is not even one social identity but a spectrum with expectations about behaviors, pronouns and names. Maybe straight is like that too, a gay connected spectrum of identity around sex. Then it’s possible to say mutual attractiveness between two people can be anywhere on the gay-straight spectrum.
How to illustrate this? Imagine the most beautiful catch, the most gorgeous time and place of assignation and just let go. It’s only a daydream, but sometimes you live it, and you know it. That was easy.
How about a more difficult case, a catch, not in your daydream but a beautiful catch all the same, the stuff dreams are made of. That’s a little harder, but you can still go further.
Beyond your imagination you meet someone completely different and you connect. Against all odds you make it work and so do they, no ocean dividing the two of you too wide.
If you’re gay then, and you are yourself, which you can’t escape from being, you might as well go ahead and enjoy being gay. Whether you like it or not, you know very well how to be perfectly gay.