My Struggle (Part 1 of 6)
A Death in the Family — Review
Introduction
Preface
I have just finished the first book in the My Struggle series. It’s going to be difficult to put into words what I feel about this book. It’s an extremely personal book, almost like reading through someone’s journal, and many things struck me as being me. You can really feel a connection with him given that he uses people’s real names and the intimate and seemingly trivial moments he experiences and describes in the book. I will try not to spoil the main parts of the book, but I feel like, even if you do get it spoiled, the book will remain just as good (it didn’t ruin the book for me).
I came into this book thinking that this was Knausgaard’s (stylized Knausgård) only well-known work, and that this series was the only one that had garnered him fame. That is true to some degree, as the My Struggle series skyrocketed him to being one of the world’s most read writers. However, his first two books (the only two prior to My Struggle) won him many awards and nominations, including winning the Norwegian Critic’s Prize for Literature in 1998.
Life and Notoriety
Karl Ove Knausgaard was born in 1968 in Oslo, Norway. He’s moved many times throughout his youth and adult life; around Norway and Sweden, before settling where he is now, living between London and Sweden.
Upon release in 2009 in his home country of Norway, this book caused lots of outrage. Knausgaard really digs deep into the intricacies and dynamics of his family, and the many intimate, private moments he shared with girls, friends, his wife, and family members. This was not received well by many people who believed he went too far. Another reason is that, in Norwegian, the title is: Min Kampf. As you’ve probably guessed, it’s quite similar to Mein Kampf, Hitler’s notorious autobiography. Don’t get the wrong idea though, this is not a dogmatic political agenda, this is Knausgaard’s life.
Themes
I think the main theme is quite prominent. It’s even in the title. Death. He starts the book talking about it, and how we misconceive it, and finishes with a realization and acceptance of death. Coming full circle to a degree. However, although death is the main theme, it is a background to his father, who, although he dislikes and hates to some degree, is just as irreplaceable to part of his life.
Another irreplaceable part of his life is his writing. We can see him struggling (only a small glimpse and taste of what he must’ve really felt) to become a writer. He wonders a few times throughout the book about how he would like to be a famous writer, and how deep-rooted his ambition of this is. Throughout the book though you get to see the basic struggles that writers face, such as sleeping in, or when life hits you and takes main stage.
Death
“The moment life departs the body, it belongs to death.”
The book starts out on a contemplation of death. The book ends with a long scene about death and addiction.
Death oozes throughout this book. Knausgaard states he is not afraid of death, and that humans are not inherently afraid of the idea of death either; it’s the physical form of death we fear. Bodies, flowers, animals, we shy away from their dead forms. We are constantly trying to hide the physical form of death while the idea of death is all around us: in the news we listen to, in the stories we read, and in lots of other media. However, the physical form of death is usually something hidden, something that we bury and don’t speak about. You don’t see a picture of a dead body on the television do you? It’s one of those things where we have an idea of what it is, but, in reality, is probably so much different.
Death is something we all carry within us. Whether it’s the death of a grandparent, parent, family member, sibling, or friend. It is part of life’s course, not astray like we can something think it to be.
“And death, which I have always regarded as the greatest dimension of life, dark, compelling, was no more than a pie that springs a leak, a branch that cracks in the wind, a jacket that slips off a clothes hanger and falls to the floor.”
His Father
Beside himself, Knausgaard’s father plays the biggest role in the story. Perhaps it’s not what Knausgaard’s father does physically, it’s what he’s done behind-the-scenes, mentally to Knausgaard that shapes the book. To me it seemed like Knausgaard partially wrote the book to both mourn his father and move on.
We see him as a miserable figure. One who inflicts mental abuse onto his children and spouse. Because of this, Knausgaard’s father has a very strict, masculine character to him.
However, what we don’t see perhaps, is the abuse he inflicts upon himself. One of the most shocking part to me is when, Knausgaard, walking into his house, hears music blasting and calls out to his father. When realizing his father doesn’t know he was home, Knausgaard sneaks up to see his father, and finds him slunk back on a sofa, crying silent tears. Knausgaard then runs away shocked and spends the night at a friend’s house.
His father’s outward portrayal of himself is clearly not at all what he was like inside. We see this again later when his father hosts a party and starts to show that inward side of him, wearing things more feminine-like as opposed to his very rigid and masculine demeanour.
Knausgaard’s grandmother, who we see at first as a women punished by Knausgaard’s father’s behaviour, turns out to not be who he thought her as, or who we thought she was, and so I wonder if Knausgaard’s father simply was a product of his environment growing up. I often think that children don’t see their grandparents as who they really were, since they have a different connection with their children as opposed to their grandchildren.
Time
The book starts out when Knausgaard was a teenager, going through some of his fonder memories: partying, hanging out with girls, and how he’d take the bus to go everywhere. It then progresses to him being in his mid 30s, married to his first wife and writing the book that would go on to be his second published work: A Time for Everything, which won him numerous awards and nominations.
He talks about wasting time. About how time is malleable and ever-moving. We hear about many first times, and there seems to be a transition in mood to this staleness in his older life. Like he’s grown bored. It doesn’t carry the same fire that his younger years did — and, as I imagine, everyone’s do. Though it is nevertheless an exciting read. The mood switch doesn’t affect the enjoyment of the book, it is just something that resides in the background.
Knausgaard also has this driving ambition to be great. Something he wanted so much he published this book despite the kickback he knew he’d get. This ambition does not change throughout the time in the book. You can feel how much he wants it in his words.
“Time is slipping away from me, running through my fingers like sand while I… do what?”
Conclusion
This was a great read, and, given it’s the first in six-book series, I will be buying and reading the rest of it. Knausgaard knows how to make normal things sound so beautiful (like Robert Walser) which makes me wonder how many little things we overlook in life. I think this book too, since it is so vulnerable, shows his weaknesses and mental shortcomings that accompany every human being, and I think it’s great at telling you — in a very roundabout way — to embrace your own.
The next volume: A Man in Love, is longer. I hope it manages to deliver the same impact as this first one.
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