While in Spain, when fellows of the grant program I was in, marketing gurus, curious ones and occasional acquaintances were asking me to explain systemic work and constellations approach “as if you are talking to five years old” — I was genuinely amazed. To someone with a bit of background in working with toddlers and preschoolers in a bilingual environment, the reference to that stage of development of human beings is quite interesting. Am I still talking to an adult who is able to listen, hear and be with modern complexity or not? What is the capacity for response-ability here?
And I love simplicity and clarity too, and even more I love the sense of the principle. Perhaps, it is one of the developmental aspects I am missing in current theories about childhood, where typology is often overtaking and knowing is prioritized towards the unknown. The sense of principle meanwhile, is wonderful! In the opening of Genesis the Hebrew word BERAESHITH is translated as “in the beginning” and explained often as “in the principle” or “at-first-in-principle". So what are the principles of systemic constellations concerning entrepreneurs?
the main principle: what once has been excluded, would knock your attention until it is acknowledged and integrated.
The inter-generational and collective transmission of epigenetic imprints would always flow through the ones who are available, and in that sense past is timeless, it is only what we collectively carry as yet unresolved. Through physical or mental health symptoms, through issues in relationships of various types, through career and money, through the ideas, projects and start-ups of yours.
The principle is always there to indicate the origins, give a movement and space towards new forms of life and the process of it is surely arranging meetings with trauma, shadow and the past of our ancestry.
on the individual level
Once you step out of the “employee” track, and disentangle yourself from the organizational systems that provided certain aspects of structure, security, cultural “know-how” and belonging…the so-desired sense of freedom, fulfillment of doing what is meaningful or right for you, may show itself as quite a temporary guests on your daily routine.
Yet the multilayered cake of hardships may take over all the space that has been freed, and meetings with the spectrum of your “success” of being a child are guaranteed. It is truly difficult to be a “successful” adult if some of the child`s needs are not yet met, stages of development are not fully lived and belonging is still something to seek for or work hard to keep.
The hardship of this layer is in mutuality of give and take. Because pursuing childhood dreams, getting your needs met, and keep developing is natural and fine at any stages of your journey, while acknowledging what is there to give and what is there to receive in various types of relationships (with partners, clients, stakeholders) and feeling equal at the process of such exchange is not that easy.
on the family layer
The term “pattern” lately tends to be perceived as something negative, yet it is the symbiosis of structure, “know-how”, gifts and knowledge of family “budget” and your main ability to interact with outer systems and be in relationships. In principle, it serves the simplicity of being good at doing what you can, harvesting the results of your work and letting the creativity flow.
The disturbances and appearing difficulties of this layer may indicate loyalties to the past scenarios of living and working, to the “heritage” of the family of origin and how deep love and belonging make us take on the inter-generational “burdens” from the family system that was not yet resolved and mostly originating from someone that had been excluded before. You might recognize such by the sense of doing things “for others” that are not fulfilling, not nurturing you, not bringing the needed exchange and keep burning you out even when you try so hard and for so long.
ancestral layer
At first in principle, EVERYTHING we are is due to our ancestors. Honouring the life we are given, the possibilities, the hardships, the skills and knowledge, the trauma and shadow, the belonging — is an act of acknowledging everything as it is (not a better or worth, or desired versions)
If freedom is our ability to respond, how much of your life do you want to spend on “going against this or that”, “fighting for”, “making them change”, “knocking closed doors” or anything that is coming from the unresolved past weaved in timeless curves of the nervous system reactions and living legacy of trauma?
After all, every entrepreneurial effort is about a deeper meeting of oneself and nurturing your soul. Because circumstances may change, the project may change, the start-up may change, and each time connecting to the essence of what it means to be alive for You matter most along with the question: what wants to live through me now?
