Understanding your past, Being kinder to yourself!

Photo by Andre Mouton on Unsplash

I have always been quite hesitant to write about narcissism due to my past experiences and my role as a therapist. I was worried my own experiences could be seen as projections onto my clients and I wanted to make sure my boundaries were clear enough to absolutely everyone, an obvious side-effect of the narcissistic treatment I endured in the past…

However, I felt literally saved by my therapist years ago, who really helped me understand how narcissists train your brain to accept the unacceptable and how to break free. …

Goals — Coaching

There is an action plan you can create and personalize that helps you truly achieve your goals in 2020!

Losing 20 pounds, starting a new yoga class, getting more me-times, spending more time with loved ones, January 1st is for many the right time of the year to make these new resolutions. Unfortunately, it is believed that most will either fail to stick to them, or even start them altogether before the end of the month. However, a few are successful in achieving their goals. Why and how?

Is January 1st the best time to start?


Latest and final episode of my series called expatriation. Last not but not least…. How to bring your four legged-companion abroad?

For people like me, the expat life would not be complete without taking every single member of the family and that also means my cat. I was raised with dogs, horses, a tortoise and when I started to live on my own, the very first thing I did was to get MY cat, Muesli.

My Move to London


Moving abroad is draining. Adjusting to a new culture and system is daunting. Adapting to a new health system with a disabled or sick relative may look like a roller coaster!

Moving abroad is a massive life change. As I stated in my previous articles, we need to find our tribe, a community we feel good in. We also have to adjust to a new work mentality, a new job market and new ways of interacting. I have mentioned the pain we may go through when we lose a loved one at a distance. And how about moving and living abroad with a partner, a relative, a kid who is disabled or ill due to physical or mental health? That makes the transition even tougher and worrying.


Episode 3 — The Expatriation Series is all about the different aspects of Expatriation & challenges we all face when moving abroad.

Moving abroad usually means either having been offered an overseas placement or looking for a job in a new unknown market. Either way, you will have to face a new mindset, new codes, new way of interacting and networking. This can be especially tough when the culture of the locals you now depend on has very different codes from the ones you are used to. How to overcome these differences?

1. Find the right network


How to bear the unbearable when you live far away?

Grief is a natural response to loss. Coping with the loss of a loved one is a really tough challenge and may seem overwhelming and impossible. It is even tougher on us when we live abroad and the deceased used to live at a distance. How to bear the unbearable? How to accept the unacceptable?

1. Be kind to yourself


Expatriation Series — Episode 1

Have you ever heard of the term ‘Moai’? What does it mean and how could this be related to expatriation?

1. Experiencing a new culture

Moving abroad is such a fantastic adventure! We leave our home country, full of hope, dreams, fantasies and of course loads of expectations. Some of them may be right, others not so much. And that is exactly when we may go through the now popular ‘culture shock‘.

The initially euphoric stage known as ‘Tourist Stage‘, when nearly everything is sunshine and rainbows, may be followed by a dramatic plunge. A deep sense of loss starts kicking in. You miss your…


The Guide for Survival dedicated to Expats

Following a conference I gave on culture shock & reverse culture shock, I’m about to post a mini-series on expatriation to offer you psychological & emotional tips as well as practical advice.

When I first moved to London, it was quite a hassle since I had to wait for about 6 months to be able to bring my cat. Then, Muesli was not allowed to get on the Eurostar, so I had to rent a car to drive to Calais and get on a ferry to Dover.

✈️ However, I found out the true meaning of ‘hassle’ when I had…


How do you feel when you switch on the news or read them? Strong warning against each and every harmful act we all do to ourselves, to our habitat, to our world. Perverse narcissism making the headlines, abuse and assault on every medium, protests, complaints, job losses, wars, bomb attacks, and so on. How do we tend to respond to this daily negative dose we clearly cannot avoid? Denial, sarcasm, retreat, and at times extreme positivity.

Don’t get me wrong, positivity does exist and it doesn’t lead to toxicity necessarily. We also learn from this tough world thankfully! An equally…

Relationship Dynamics

“We meet the people we’re supposed to when the time is just right”, Alyson Noel.

Photo by Helena Lopes on Unsplash

Each and every person we meet teaches us a life lesson. Either good or bad according to our own background, relationship patterns, and phases of life, this specific person offers a new perspective that we do not have to agree on but that we must respect. We should also understand the impact on our own vision and personal journey.

1. Are we meant to meet the right people?

Margareth van Steenlandt

Accredited Expat Coach. Business Coach. Therapist/Psychology. London/Paris Topics: expat, loss, grief, narcissism

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