One thing I was not able to achieve in the past was not being able to express my ideas and thoughts on a platform such as in a group of people, in class and in family gatherings. A feeling that I will say something wrong and people will laugh at me was always there. But when some other person comes up with the somewhat same idea as that of mine and being appreciated at that time I regret that I should have expressed myself. Due to my introvert behavior I miss a lot of fun in social events because I go for solitude at that time. This is the very thing to be changed in me and the fear to change is always there.
I want to groom myself in expressing ideas because in future this point is going to work a lot. In a progressive organization there is always a need of a person who comes up with some unique and distinct idea We learn a lot of new things from others related to a our certain idea, discussion goes to a new dimension and our own knowledge gets improved and finally we have the tolerance to bear criticism on our work or thoughts whether we are in a right direction or wrong. We get feedback from different people which lead to professional grooming.
Not opening up, sometimes leads me to a feeling that I am better alone I don’t participate in group activities and I have a very narrow circle of close friends. Once I was in my chemistry class I raised a question and at that time all of my class started laughing two or three times this happened with me and after that I was like I will not speak a word during the class that’s all. But now at university level I feel I should express my self because in vivas most of the time I knew the answers or ideas, how to solve the problem but I was not able to speak, I was not able to take the initiative to any task because of internal fear that I will say something wrong and people will laugh at me and sometimes it’s the background which hinders me to talk in front of people who are from far better colleges & schools than me and who are well groomed.
The tasks which can change my attitude or decrease the fear to speak out what’s in my mind are,1st task,Have the self confidence that whatever I am talking is right, ignoring the people’s response, enhancing the ability to face criticism and taking that criticism in a positive way.2nd task,Practice the first step by participating in class discussions, in friend groups and in gatherings. Coming up with certain ideas giving opinions about a thing and learn just to talk what is in mind.3rd task,Learn how to have the confidence, a proper way of giving and presenting idea by joining a platform where skills are polished and improved. Where one is allowed to speak whatever he wants to speak.
Having the confidence was a very difficult thing because coming from a small town to a big city is just like a shock. Definitely we experience different things, new environment and new people. I still remember my first day in UET I was so much confused in class and I was feeling like every body is noticing me in a strange way. In introducing myself in first class I felt shy because my class fellows were from well known colleges of Lahore. But with the passage of time I learnt how to be a part of growing society. Second task was then a bit easy after having the confidence I started to talk to my class fellows, participated in group discussions and got appreciation from my friends. To have the full grip I decided to join a platform after discussing with friends and search on media I applied for Amal academy. And now I have started the journey.
Learning is a process that never stops with each experience in life we learn different things. I learnt self confidence, ability to express my thoughts, how to tolerate the criticism and how to take things in a positive way. And in Amal academy I have learnt how to interact with people, how to share ideas with people and how to work in a team. Now I am much better than before I like to attend social events and my friend circle is also large I know a lot new faces by their names and their stories so I don’t hesitate to tell my story to anyone.
As I am on my journey to learn so much in Amal academy I will apply in my practical life what I will learn. And I will definitely make my self valuable for organisations seeking for new ideas. And one thing I will do must I will remove this fear from my town fellows because unfortunately one of my junior from my college who came to UET she asked me every time to speak for her for example I talked to one of her teacher about some of her problems and then teacher said to her if you cannot speak what are you supposed to do here. After one or two week she left because of lack of confidence to speak. I will definitely do my best in this regard.