Fired

It was hard finding a black man’s picture for this
I was let go by my employer today.
I tried to fight and negotiate the decision, but this was made a long time ago.
I wanted this job to be the only one on my resume till retirement.
It was the best job ever and I doted on it mornings, nights and every time in between, hoping to rise through the ranks.
Conflicts can always be resolved by doing more of the good work or so I thought.
The foundation was weak and I tried to solidify it and failed while doing it.
Largely I think knowing I wanted to do this all my life made me comfortable; I should’ve approached everyday like it was my last.
If I can i will do better this time.
Heaven give me another chance?
Sadly this journey has come to an end and I will cherish this experience dearly.
What the hell am I supposed to do now?
Get better, fix my shit and hone my skills?
Or play old songs, cry and chug ice cream because I’ve been fired from the best job I ever had?
Maybe I can just end it and fall off this bridge of soliloquy.
Was it a dream or not?

Sundays have always been filled with anxiety.