Yesterday was my 34th birthday.

By all accounts, that’s an age where one should be settled (whatever that means) and confident in their life path (oh, is there a map and a road I wasn’t aware of?).

Last year, I wanted so much. What, I wasn’t sure. And looking back, that’s part of the problem. But my resolution was “to be open.” I thought if I told the world I was ready, the world would come. But it didn’t. …

“What if?”

Those two little words, combined, are two of the most powerful words in the English language. Their whispers keep me up at night, and get me going in the morning. Hope and anxiety and second-guessing and possibility all tied up in 8 neat characters.

Whenever I’m on the cusp of a large life decision, I’m wracked with the wrath of the “what if?” …

Moving is a natural part of growing into this life of ours. It’s how we stretch ourselves, expand networks, have new experiences, and compile fun stories to tell our grandchildren about that “one summer abroad” in college.

I didn’t expect to leave my current home in San Francisco for quite some time, but when I learned I was accepted into graduate school at The London School of Economics, I was ecstatic. Naturally, I turned to social media to share my big news. Amidst the kudos and congratulations, one question kept coming up: “Does this mean that you’re moving to London?”

…

I wrote poems regularly as a teenager (*cringe*), but stopped as I got older and, allegedly, less angsty. Situations that would have created lines and lines of poorly constructed prose at 15 no longer affected me as I crossed over into my 30s. So when I was assigned yesterday to write haikus on any subject, I thought it’d be a bit of a chore, but pretty quick to whip out once I put pen to paper.

What I discovered was a talent for turning even the happiest of subjects into their bleakest possible incarnations; some musings on past lovers; and…

I’ve gotten used to being alone and most of the time, I rather like it. The fact that I travel alone, dine alone, and go on adventures alone has recently been a source of pride. Being a single woman of a certain age means accepting that if you wait for a boyfriend or husband or even friends to do certain things, you may never do them at all. It takes a lot of courage to flout social norms and the inevitable stares and incredulous looks when you say “table for one.”

And then you have that moment, where you’re singled…

After only going on 4 dates in 10 months from dating app The League, I decided to deactivate my account. When I did so, I noticed something interesting I hadn’t seen before: Member stats.

The metrics The League chose to include map astonishingly well to how people act in real life when it comes to looking for love. How picky are you? Are you responsive? Do people generally like you? Do you have the courage to initiate conversation? Do you follow through on your word?

Our member stats give quantitative proof to our qualitative assumptions about how we are when…

The #metoo posts in the past weeks have been powerful, but I watched from the sidelines and instead of joining their voices, simply clicked the heart on everyone’s brave posts. But I didn’t share my experiences or join in because what I’ve experienced is so “normal.” But it’s the normalization of bad behavior that’s helped to create the situation in the first place.

I’ve been extremely lucky. I haven’t been sexually assaulted. I haven’t always been sober enough to give proper consent, but I’ve never felt taken advantage of by any partner (with one exception). I haven’t been held back…

We called it “science burger.” Because, frankly, that’s what it was.

Weighing in at 52lbs and containing almost 2,500 pages, the Modernist Cuisine cookbook has been described by some as “the cookbook to end all cookbooks.” It focuses on the perfection of food; if a cookbook could earn a PhD in molecular gastronomy, this one would have it with honors. I’d heard of it when it first came out, as it retailed at an outrageous price and won several very prestigious awards, such as the James Beard Foundation’s “Cookbook of the Year” award in 2012.

So, when my friend Becca…