Page 0: Going or Coming
In observance of a New Year’s Resolution made last year and the year before that and possibly the year before that… I am writing for myself. This blog / set of personal stories will document a journey that I intend to commence today without any inclination to end or real promise to continue. I all know is, I’m moving now.
For reference, I am about to launch into the real world after a comfy childhood in suburban northern Jersey, a necessarily uncomfortable teen years in suburban East Bay Area, and finally (presently) an all-too-comfortable almost-four-years at what some call the best university in the country. So this is my starting point, I’m a kid that’s going to be ceremoniously ejected from her nest. Stanford will put on a nice show (narrated by some guy named Richard Engel), and suddenly I will no longer be a student. I will join the hoards of salary-earners by making a great return to the coast of my birth. NYC here I come.
The purpose of this “medium” is to unpack and organize the thoughts, memories, emotions, and general chaos that exists in my mind. Montaigne claimed to also be writing his essays for self-indulgent purposes, in addition to the thoughtful side-note that his posterity might take solace in having his hundreds of pages of drivel to leaf through after his death. I have no such loved ones who I suspect would want to encapsulate my mental meanderings for eternity. All I want is clarity of thought. For me. For myself. So what…
So as I said, I will be leaving 10 years of life in the Bay to hunt down a new set of adventures on the other side of the country. I should also say: I have made plans to stay there for a while. Probably over 8 years. So I’ll spend my 20s first in the city working at a place called D. E. Shaw Research, then I’ll be back to studying and my subject will be how life can known. In other words, I’ll be getting a Ph.D. in Neuroscience from Princeton. So 2 years work + 6 years study = 8. Then I’ll be 30. Such is life 1/3 through.
So there lies the skeleton of my future, the facts upon which a billion possibilities hang, and the only constants are my past and my surroundings. The rest is a mystery. Am I going away from a temperate paradise where I have matronly family and a someone who could have been “the one”? Or am I coming into a future of discovering the world and myself through new eyes? I hope it’s the latter. It will make these next few pages something worth reading, and it will make my life something worth living.