Let’s start with the honest truth. Divorce is an ugly thing.

No matter what background your coming from. Kids are going to be angry for a while but it’s after the divorce I want to talk about. Things I wish my parents did in the process of their divorce. My parents was one of the ugliest divorces I have heard of my entire life, just to put it in prospective.

The number one thing I wish my parents did was not to put me in the middle. If my Mom was annoyed or angry with my Dad, I was the one who got to hear about it and vis versa.

I had a younger brother but since I was eight and knew what was going on I suffered most of the memories through it. But that initial two years of adjustment was nothing compared to what I thought was worse in the years after. It’s been a year since I moved out and it was finally freedom from the trash talk back and forth. I still hear about it thought, they think I can handle because of my age. No child wants to hear the bad things about their other parent, they still love them even if you don’t.

The second thing I wish stopped happening was the bickering. You guys are divorced now so the bickering needs to cease.

I know theres going to be things that you’ll always need to discuss: parenting styles, money, etc. The bickering that goes along with it? Cut it out. That’s still hurting the kids and adding hatred thats not needed between you guys. And trust me, the kids remember that stuff.

The third thing was that my parents forgot that it took both of them to make me. I have 23 chromosomes from Mom and 23 chromosomes from Dad.

The love that you once shared created a human being, you should always put your difference aside to give that human being a good life. The scariest momement in the future for me? If my parents will get along well enough to plan and help with my wedding. That’s sad in my eyes. Divorced parents should be able to grow up enough to love and support that child.

This is only a small amount of advice throughout my parent’s divorce but I hope you can see the top of the iceburg with this.