For Good Men To See Nothing
Ken Burnside

  • KEEP AN EYE OUT for smiling monsters. Once you learn to spot them, they’re easy to recognize. They don’t make eye contact with other men or figures of authority, until they’re confronted. They tend to have head gestures (nodding or shaking their head) that are completely opposite of what their words are saying. They’re not prepared for follow-up questions. They get nervous when you talk to their prey, and start edging away. They escalate on raunchy humor, like what’s described above. They have a habit of boldly invading the personal space of anyone female, in ways that they wouldn’t do to a man.
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  • I don’t make eye contact with anyone unless confronted (I am a diagnosed case of Autism Spectrum Disorder), have trouble successfully coordinating gestures of any kind with my words, and if someone accuses me of just about anything, will get nervous and start stuttering (if this accusation gets worse on account of the stuttering, it can actually cause a nervous breakdown). I also have a very raunchy sense of humor, and usually have to be told when I’ve crossed the line (Generally will take this to heart though and try to reign myself in).
  • I am, unlike those you state to be such, uncomfortable with ANY physical contact, invasion of personal space, or request to get closer to someone outside of very specific people. In addition, I can honestly claim to have no actual sex drive, even though I find human sexuality a gold mine for humor in like-minded company.
  • Therefore, it is important to note for those like myself that ultimately recognizing someone as what you call a “Smiling Monster” requires considering the whole picture and the intent with which it is being painted. Otherwise you are likely to accuse well meaning folks who do not intend on making others uncomfortable (And indeed, will gladly step to the defense of those they even remotely suspect had unwanted advances made against them). In the case of someone like myself, whose sole social life revolves around these hobbies, it’s a life destroying accusation, and one that can cause complete mental breakdowns and eventually suicide attempts.
  • My conclusion is this: Only act against someone you suspect as intentionally making others uncomfortable if your inquiries to the victim in private verify your suspicions, and unless unwanted physical contact is involved, talk with the accused and tell them to state their original intentions and make amends if they show that they did not intend such and feel remorse over the way they made the victim feel.
  • TL:DR Version : Make sure the man you’re accusing is either doing what he is on purpose, or unwilling to make an effort to stop the behavior for the benefit of those affected… Collateral damage of any sort is best avoided.. Just because you suspect your neighbor of a crime does not mean he is guilty.
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