The Pretty Personal Jesus Are Gone
I’m not a woman / I’m not a man / I am something that you’ll never understand /
It’s been a bad year for pretty men of power. And a year full of heavy hearts for those of us who sought strength and confidence from the kinetic energy they put out into our world, suddenly extinguished by this thing called life. Both David Bowie and Prince were uniquely attractive men, men that didn’t fit the mold of conventional beauty. But more than a pretty face, they empowered people. To see a man who doesn’t overpower but empower a woman sexually, that is still far and few in between in our modern society. Prince took your hand, slid it down and told you to call if you wanted to grind, dominance reversed. Bowie wanted you to lay the real thing on him, both artist beckoning you to come inside and be in control. In a world where men are generally in charge, here were these pretty, waifish and so beautiful it was both thrilling (and a little scary) people, cooing in your ear that you actually had the power.
And these weren’t men who stayed on the fringe of popular culture. These were bonafide idols with commercial success. It’s much easier now to toe the line of gender and sexuality in pop music, but Bowie and Prince were some of the pioneers. Sure, they were aping James Brown and Little Richard most of the time, but they took all that raw sexuality, the bravado and the “is he or isn’t he” and “who the hell cares?!” attitude and put it full frontal. Bowie strung across a chaise lounge in a silk dress, Prince naked posing like a pinup girl, whether they were trying to be provocative or sexual, they just simply were those things. Even if played up for a persona or stage presences, those admirably open and unabashed sides of them were true. When Prince claimed he wasn’t a woman and not a man, but something that you’ll never understand, he put into words the way so many felt. The who cares attitude, because who we are as people is deeper than these labels and our individuality, our most primal self, is what make us, and what made Prince and Bowie, so damn sexy.
And if you didn’t believe in a god or the status quo, these were the type of monolithic figures that became your idol, your personal jesus. If you needed guidance, you looked to them, their lyrics, the lessons they learned and shared or the way they lived their lives. To consume art, to keep parts of your life private but to be public about who you really are, to be generous not only with yourself and the ones you love, but with the world itself. They represented a part of human nature that is stronger than most biological theory taught in a textbook, an essence that was attractive across a sexual line. If people on the other side could see the appeal of this person, even if they’ve never felt that way before, then maybe they’d understand why some of us found everyone to be the beautiful ones. And if A MAN could live and act like Bowie and Prince (and no less a man of color with Prince), then anything felt possible for everyone else.
Artist that break barriers down for the disenfranchised, that take on a responsibility of changing the perception and flipping an ideology, they are so vital for moving forward the direction of our society accepting and including everyone. Pop culture and what we consume as a whole can greatly affect how we treat women, minorities, the LGBT community. The idea that we can dress how we want, love and fuck and enjoy whoever in our life, and it’s simply just us living, is a lot easier to translate when we have cultural touchstones to reference. It’s easier when you can point to the likes of Bowie and Prince, shrug and say “would you expect anything less from me when these are the people I follow?” as you tell your parents you don’t subscribe to heteronormative beliefs. An example to offer up, a likeness, to those who might not understand who you are deep inside. It takes the taboo out of preconceived societal ideas and becomes, if anything, a bit of a boring topic, so we can simply live an authentic life.
Bowie and Prince blurred the lines of sexuality and also owned the sexual part of themselves, but it was something most of the time they didn’t talk about much (outside of their lyrics). Because it was just parts of who they were, and not even the most exciting parts. They were more focused on talking about the art they created. Because really, what a bore it is to talk about something in your life you enjoy or identify with, but isn’t the true focus of who you are. These parts should be nurtured and celebrated, but there are so many more important things for people to focus on, and artists like Prince and Bowie showed this on a much larger platform than most have access to. So as we mourn the loss of the music this year, we also mourn the loss of these people, forces, that helped us come to terms with breaking down notions and constriction put on us. People who helped us find the beautiful ones, the pretty things, deep inside.
