Advice on How to Move Half Way Across the Country With a Four Month Old (and three cats)

Don’t do it. No seriously, I’ve been there, done that, please just don’t do it.

But, if you must… Here’s how I survived to tell the tale.

A little background: I’d been back at work for a few weeks and I was finding the time away from my daughter, R, too much to stomach. Commuting two hours a day, in addition to my 8 hour+ workday, was just too much. The mommy guilt was unbearable. My supervisor was extremely helpful and allowed me to work from home for a few hours once a week, and although I loved my job, I didn’t see it as being more valuable than having more quality time with my daughter. Five days a week, I only got to say good morning and good night. So, when the time came to take an opportunity to move, my husband and I didn’t have to think twice.

The drawback? We had to be in Texas in ten days. Yes. Ten days. Ten days in which my husband and I still had to work full time (which meant that with our crazy schedules, we didn’t have more than an hour off at the same time), my beautiful sister-in-law was getting married, we had to pack our entire, cluttered, two bedroom apartment, and, due to some unfortunate circumstances, I had to pull R out of daycare.

I guess, then, you could surmise that we were a little overwhelmed.

But we did it. We finished out our work weeks, signed the lease on a place to live, we partied at the weeding, and packed up our entire apartment all within a week (thank you in-laws, you are so magical).

So, with three cats and R, we filled our small SUV with the items we couldn’t live without. We decided on some clothes (mostly suites for my husband), R’s pack’n play to sleep in, the array of items required for daily childcare (how do tiny people need so much stuff??), sheets for our blow up matters (that was being mailed to our new place), and an AV car adaptor so I could pump on the road (did I mention I was exclusively pumping everyday?). And so it began.

Is everyone in??

Here’s what we learned:

• Under no circumstances should you fill your car to the point that you are unable to sit in the backseat next to your child. You WILL suffer the consequences. Need advice on what to leave behind from the small amount of items you’ve already scaled back on? Clothes and shoes. Sure, you might end up beating your things to your new apartment by TWENTY DAYS, but, trust me, f- the clothes. You need to sit next to your kid.
• You don’t need to bring 100 diapers. No matter what state you’re driving through, they WILL have diapers.
• Cat carriers take up a lot of room. And pretty much every hotel will charge you an arm and a leg to bring them in. You’re just going to have to deal with it. Plus, they make good cuddle buddies since they are so grateful to be out of the car!

Happy campers.

• Pumping in a car is actually not that bad. Sure, a few passerby’s may see your boobies hooked up to a weird contraption and give you a strange look. But, you’re stuck in a car, what else do you have to do?
• Sometimes, the baby is going to cry. And you will too. You’ll get through it. Take deep breaths.
• DON’T yell at your partner. Bumpy roads, lack of rest stops, traffic: things that are not their fault.
• Plan your trip so that you only have to drive six to seven hours each day. Eight is just asking for a meltdown.
• About half way through your trip, your kid is going to be *SO* over it. Sorry. No advice for that one.
• Try your best to keep some type of schedule. Everything is so unpredictable that your kid may feel a bit out of sorts. With good reason. So plan to leave at the same time every morning, if you can.
• You don’t co-sleep with your baby? Now might be a good time to bend the rules a little. (Reduced stress by tenfold— and allowed me to get precious sleep.)
• Bring their favorite toys and books. They will feel comforted by the familiarity! But with those items, limit to letting them only have two or three each day, then rotate. Helps with the boredom.
• Hug your partner and tell them you love them, frequently.
• Take frequent rest stops (we did every 2 1/2–3 hours). And during those rest stops, DANCE for as long as you can! Even in the rain.

The seat belt was fascinating!

• You DON’T need your stroller. You most certainly can live without it for a few weeks. That’s what carriers are for. ;)
• Try to position yourself so that if you can’t sit in the backseat with your kid, you can at least do a weird twisty reach around the seat and carseat trick so that you can hold your baby’s hand. You may feel like you are contorting your body in ways you never thought possible (and it may hurt like hell the next day), but, hey, at least you get your tiny human to stop screaming at the top of her lungs.
• Something we didn’t do that I wish we had: Take a “test” trip and drive for a few hours a few days before your trip to get your kid familiar with long periods in the car.
• Once the trip is over, don’t EVER do it again.

We made it!