Questions that should be retired permanently

Just don’t.

Category: Don’t even bother/things that are none of your fucking business whatsoever

“When are you going to get engaged/married/pregnant?”

“Why aren’t you drinking?”

“Is that / are those real?”

“Can I give you some advice?”

Category: Don’t even bother asking because the answer will be neither satisfactory nor logical and will throw you into a rage spiral

“Why did you vote that way?”

“Why’d you throw that into the recycling when it was compostable?”

“Can you explain that joke to me?”

“So you donate to the NRA because…?”

“Explain to me again why you subscribe to Popular Mechanics?”

“You spent how much of our money on that?”

Category: If you even have to ask, you probably already have your answer

“Why are we still together?”

“You promise you’ll never hit me again, right?”

“You’re not gonna let this go, are you?”

“So you’re saying there’s a chance?”