Sorry, I didn’t @ you, Kindra J. F., didn’t know if you wanted to be.

I figure that most white folks don’t talk class outside of our personal circles. A lot of us never think about it until we’re pointing at “low class whites” in pictures.

“My ex had a low-class, all-accepting kind of vibe (because his dad was closeted gay), but he was also very subconscious elitist and privileged.”

Not unsurprising. He had the lower class upbringing tempered by the middle to upper class money and probably peers. You will often see whites of multiple class backgrounds have trait associated with more than one class.

“I wonder in terms of race … do you think a white person of money and a black person of money would be seen as more preferable than a white person of money with a white person with no money?”

Depends on the white with the preference and their class(es). For example, a solidly middle class white both socially and economically would by preference associate with the more solidly middle class couple. A lower class person would probably go for the all white couple because the person with no money got money by association, and they may be hoping the luck rubs off.

“I know you’re not the white messiah, LJ (laughing), but I also wonder how whites of different cultures and ethnicities see one another?”

That adds another layer of complexity. Certain European national origins can’t much stand others. When you have people who have stuck with or maintained strong national/cultural identities, there can be friction. Think English and Irish, German and French, Polish and Russian for the kinds of conflicts that can ensue. (Yes, I know Russians technically aren’t European.) Plus some of the home customs and culture are different, and that depends on the degree of assimilation.

Then you add religion in, and you get really weird stuff. One white catholic lady I know was asked in all seriousness if they sacrificed babies to Mary by another white lady who was baptist.

“… I wonder if white Americans have more of a longing to be accepted by Europeans, etc. than the other way around?”

This happens, especially if the white in question is an Anglophile or a Francophile. The fact that “Eurostyle” is sometimes a white “thing” is an indication.

Often whites of mixed heritage (i.e. German, French, English, Norwegian, Irish, Spanish mutts) feel like they have no roots or culture of origin — this is why mutts (BTW, I’m a mutt) will often pick a culture and try to adopt it, and sometimes the culture is one they have no background in. This is why you get “my great-great-great-great-grandmother was an Indian princess” from some people — they are looking for some sort of identity when they don’t have a clear one of their own, and they don’t think “American” is enough of a culture. Others enjoy all of their background cultures, but don’t try to be any one culture.

“When you talk of your grandmothers … oh my. Isn’t class always tied to economics?”

Not always. You can have upper class manners and habits, but be homeless and broke. Or you can have lower class manners and habits, and be a millionaire. Or anything in between. It causes cognitive dissonance for a lot of people — not being able to live the way they were raised was “proper” or “how we do things”.

Again, people may well disagree, and this is mostly my observations and not an authoritative scholarly survey — if any such thing exists. YMMV, of course.