#9 prompt A bar conversation
Steve Mielczarek

Response #1: A Bar Conversation

Hi Steve! I’m new to this platform and to screenwriting so I’ll do my best to give you feedback as best I can.

What I liked about your scene was the “bar-setting” dialogue. I struggle with dialogue, hence, that is why I am taking the challenge. You seem to have an ease in writing back and forth banter. Well-done.

One thing that was not clear to me is Connie’s character. The lipstick and boobs comments through me off. Perhaps if you write a little intro at the top so that I have a bettersense of the tone I would better understand. It’s probably my lack of experience though.

I look forward to reading more of your work!

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