How I Survived Self-Inflicted Waterboarding*

A Father’s Day Memory

My son laughing at me after winning a game of Othello 61–3

Get ready: your kids will be coming of age much sooner than you realize.

There is a special time in your children’s lives when they cross the threshold of adulthood. For most people, that realization comes as a shock, well after-the-fact, and is often traumatic for all parties involved.

• The father clings to his title of protector and strongest man in the house.
• The mother fears she will lose her baby.
• And the frustrated son whose case for adult privileges has fallen on deaf ears for far too long.

For me, the moment of truth came in the summer of 2000.

Event #1: My last stand as a master of Pool-Jitsu

On June 14, 2000, the Los Angeles Lakers won their first NBA championship in twelve years. I had missed most of the Show Time years because my oldest son became my number one occupation after he was born.

As he and his brother became more self-sufficient (translations: “Get out of my room!” “Yeah, I did my homework, can I get back to my game?” and “I got some friends coming over, can you get some snacks on the way out?”), I began to rediscover the…