Cats and Christmas Trees

It’s that time of year again, where cat owners have to decide whether to

A. Put up a real Christmas tree and deal with the stress of Fluffy’s natural tree climbing instincts…

B. Put up a fake Christmas tree and not only deal with the stress of Fluffy’s natural tree climbing instincts, but that nasty habit she has of eating plastic, resulting in an expensive vet bill.

Then there is the traditional breaking of the heirloom ornaments, and last year’s lingering smell of hair and cat shit, because Fluffy decided to chew on an electric wire, and couldn’t blink for two weeks.

Well stress no more my friends! I went online and found some alternative Christmas trees! Some are concessions, some are surrendering to the feline gods, and some are brilliant.
You decide which is which…
Just so you know my two favorites are the “jack jack tree”, and the vacuum cleaner security guards.

This is wrong to me on so many different levels. Although years ago I saw a tree hanging upside down from a ceiling hook, flocked with crystal ornaments and a huge silver bow at the base of the tree. Beautiful. Looked like a crystal chandelier. I think it was a floral designer’s wetdream.

Photo courtesy of Town and Country

This is why cats are beautiful. So we don’t wear them as slippers.

Photo courtesy of Target.

“I knew if I was an a-hole long enough, I would get my own way.”

Photo courtesy of Bed, Bath, and Beyond.

“You exist only to serve me, Hooman.”

Whoever thought of this deserves a Nobel prize for sheer ingenuity.

Are you joking? This is just a dare. “You gotta hang your balls a liiiitle higher there, Hooman!

If that fox is confused, what do you think your cat will think? I call this, the ‘Jack Jack’ tree! Brilliant!

Go ahead, Mr. Piddles. Make my day…