I Wish I Was Single In The 90s
Shani Silver

How incredible it is to view the world through the eyes or another! The experience you’ve described is familiar to me, but at the same time so very foreign.

Where are all the single men? I’m here, for starters, almost always single. I am at bars and restaurants, and until fairly recently, always with friends (many of them male, most of them single). The notion that we are rare or hard to find is nigh impossible to me, but I dare not imagine that it isn’t so.

Perhaps the greatest obstacle from my perspective is sussing out available women. *Single* women are easy enough to find here and there, but more often than not, actually trying to talk to them starts a countdown: how long before they--or their salty friends--become actively hostile?

In my experience, people are more afraid of each other than they may have been in that bygone era you write about, no doubt owing largely to the oversaturation of horror stories in the media. I see it all too often in the eyes of women I approach: that ready apprehension, that thinly-veiled certainly that I’m not as nice as I “pretend” to be.

It’s hard to blame them since people who think and speak as I do are…something else. But I share your struggle. My present plan is to just move to a nation where the air of fear is a wee bit less pervasive x) .

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