Ballgowns and Realness

SMH I laugh at myself…when you decide to transcribe a 8 min vox you had done late last night to a friend because you realized damn that was some powerful shit you said so here it is in all its glory…

I’ll title this “NEVER GONNA BE ROLLING AROUND IN BALLGOWNS OR WHATNOT..”

“The biggest fears so many deal with are the fear of rejection and the fear of what other people think of them. There are so so many different fears connected to judgment — like for example the fear of being judged online and we both know that exists like you’re always going to have haters coming and going but it’s more about how do you still show up as a public figure and be OK with that and then the other big thing that I kind of blend into all my episodes or even just through everything I do is the fact that you don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to have everything handled or everything figured out or you don’t have to be fancy with like lots of money rolling around or because there’s such a stigma when we think about what a successful public figure looks like and I just think that that’s a whole other topic in itself.

A lot of people have difficulty in coming to the table real… and I hate the word authentic nowadays just because it seems like it’s such an overused kind of buzzword but people struggle with really truly kind of coming to the table as themselves fully — more so online I mean I see that just because that’s where I kind of live and breathe. But I do know that a lot of people struggle with that even just in person too so..

Obviously I’ve been doing market research for a while even if I’m not really taking notes or thinking it’s just noticing stuff and storing in my mind but I’ve been doing “market research” with this podcast since I started and as we both know on this journey you’re always doing market research you’re always kind of paying attention to different things online and in the real world…

I think I shared this in a Facebook Live but the same day that I was kind of talking about the fear of judgment and dealing with what other people are going to think of you online or in person I had this interesting experience I was on the bus and I was sitting next to this like younger girl she was probably like end of college or maybe mid twenty’s and she was sitting there on her phone on Insta and she was spending like a long time getting the perfect Instagram filter- she had a picture and she was like going through a filter after filter after filter and just kind of it struck a chord with me because I thought man, people try so hard…really working to get it “perfect” and mind you it wasn’t even like a selfie I mean that’s a whole other topic but I digress…

Why try so hard to make a perfected filtered perfect photo when it’s often like I don’t know it just feels very fake and very overdone…It takes the “in the moment” grit away…When life is just happening second by second — it’s not with the filter and I guess that’s what I always want to be and stand for and that’s what I always kind of bring to the table. The real truth the in the moment stuff…

Whenever I do podcasts or whenever I do a Facebook Live it’s like I’m not coming to the table having every answer or having everything figured out or I’m not coming to the table making sure that my lighting is always good or making sure that I’ve got like a full face of make up on …and I’m still coming to the table. More so just like a person and I think we often forget that leaders are people too. I don’t know if it’s just the stigma that gets attached to the most successful entrepreneurs or the people that have like these big flashy launches or they appear like they’re rolling in that flash and money when you don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes I mean there’s so much. So much to be said about being a leader and being someone in the public eye and I am and want to be someone that’s in some level of the public eye (we all are though) that’s like more real down to earth like this is just me like I’m not perfect. I’m never going to be like X Y or Z or like rolling around in ballgowns or whatnot. That could be cool sure but…

I guess the simplest way is I just want to be the people’s person like I don’t want to to ever be like on a pedestal I never want to make myself seem like I’m too good or I am too fancy to ever kind of talk to the people on the earth. I don’t I don’t think every leader does that it’s just kind of like that overarching theme that I see of how polished and perfect everyone tries to be and how much time we spend on figuring out the exact perfect subject line or the perfect Instagram photo or the perfect message on Facebook or the perfect e-mail. It’s just like it’s more about being in the moment. And that’s what I think I really can kind of harness and use and that’s what I really kind of have seen like people really like the fact that I never hold back or I never like try to polish myself or wait for things to be “perfect” and that’s why people know it’s like the podcast or what not — I might swear I might put my foot in my mouth. It’s just like it’s more the passion that drives that it’s just like this is me in the moment and it may not always make the most sense or the most wisdom filled high level nuclear explosive like Oh my God this is like gold presidential speech…I won’t even get started on the President haha.

People like that. More like real — transparent — gritty. Like this is just me. One person and yes I’m on this “road to success” or I’m trying to work toward stuff but it’s more like I’m never going to be someone that’s super super fancy and I was just thinking about that earlier how I think the biggest thing for me and why I’ve been doing so much content and stuff just free out there is just because yes I understand we need money to live but I’m never really one of those people that’s driven by the flash like I’m never driven by how much money is in my bank account — to me it’s if I’m taken care of and I’m happy But I don’t care. Like how much money I’m earning or how much money I have in the bank. So I guess I want to be good — stable. I want to always feel good. I want to know that I can go on a road trip or go on a plane whenever wherever I want.. doesn’t have to be first class I just want to have the ability or the luxury of being able to do and to be able to never ever have that like stress or worry about money because I know that we both have been there. It’s like I never want to be in that struggling position where I have to decide if I’m going to do my laundry or I’m going to go on the subway or I’m going to feed myself and that’s something I never want to experience again and that’s really all it comes down to it’s like I’m not looking to make crazy amounts of money. It sure would be nice but it’s not like my driving force per say. So I’m going to stop rambling ha! I talked a lot longer than I thought I would but it is ten o’clock eleven for you..”


Want to come get more realness? I’ve got this daily podcast →www.highvibelikewhat.com

I also do a ton of other things…
www.ashleytayloryannello.com

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