Is it okay to just be tired?

Most of my life I have been a walking doormat for just about everybody who’s come in and out of my life. Sometimes my life feels like the ocean its constantly turning and trying to find a study place to stop. However about the only place both of us stop is when we hit a rock wall.

I know a lot of it has to do with the fact that nobody was ever there for me when I was growing up. Because of the fact that I was a victim of so many circumstances throughout my life I was always blinded by peoples true motives.

It wasn’t until I got older that I realized most people that were in my life never used me for anything other than to advance themselves. It wasn’t until friendships were over and I was used and dried up that I saw it was never about me being a friend for them it was what I could do for them.

Even now that I’m older my life still feels like it’s in a constant churning, kicking around the sand state. Everything is constantly changing, the world around me is never the same as it was before. The will to fight for the right thing has become an exhaustive triathlon i’ve always trying to stay ahead of the race.