Before You Take That Leap of Faith to Follow Your Dreams…
“Take a leap and build your wings on the way down.” That quote is cute, until you realize that life is not a roadrunner cartoon and when you hit the ground, you can’t always just bounce back up.
I am a realistic optimist, but there is a lot of idealism that is being sold to people as advice, from countless motivational speakers and TEDTalk givers.
Almost exactly 6 years ago, I left my last full time job where I worked for someone else. I was Marketing Coordinator at a nonprofit organization in Downtown Chicago. Since then, I have never worked in an office in a traditional way. Well, except that one time in 2012 when I was broke, sick of the solopreneur grind so I applied and got hired to do marketing for a major brand. On day 1 around noon, I wanted to slide out my chair unto the floor. I made it to 5pm, when I emailed them to say day 1 would also be my last (I’m the worst). That was when it finally hit me that I better make this entrepreneur thing work because I have lost all capacity to be a functioning full time employee.
So yeah, it’s fair to say I’ve worked for myself since 2010. People often ask me “what made you take that leap of faith?” I answer honestly and say “I didn’t take a leap of faith. I was pushed.”
I was standing on the edge of the cliff, rocking back and forth, restless at what used to be my dream job. But I was not gonna quit, because I enjoyed having a steady paycheck, and health benefits. I’m a Capricorn. We like having our feet on the ground, and we’re too practical for such things sometimes. SHOUTOUT TO EARTH SIGNS.
In April 2010, when I was laid off that job, it was God/the Universe’s way of forcing me to do what I wasn’t going to do for myself. I didn’t get gusto out of the blue and I wasn’t believing in my ability to be a professional writer and digital strategist. My leap of faith was not of my doing, but it was one of the best things that could have happened to me.
When people ask “what made you take that leap of faith?” it’s a question that is loaded with “encourage me to do the same.” Before I do, I temper their expectations, and I wish more people did. I wish more people who get paid to do this were more honest about it. I wish people were realer in talking about how leaps of faith don’t have to be taken without at least looking down first.
I am a firm believe in the power of dreams, because the world is basically one giant realization of people’s collective dreams come true. We need to dream to aspire to do something that keeps us striving. But those dreams and ideas and wants mean nothing without execution, which doesn’t usually happen without a plan.
When we tell people to follow their dreams, we should also talk about the importance of strategizing our way to them.
You can leap blindly, take a running jump off the cliff and see where you end up. Sure, a gust of wind might happen to come at the perfect moment, that makes you float and you cheer and thank the Heavens, and you KNOW you were meant to do that. Other times, you come crashing to Earth.
You can also step on the edge, look down, figure out how far the fall is and what you need to do to build the wings that will sustain you. When you take that jump, you’re more prepared for what’s to come. You might have even gotten half your wings on already so it’s not as much of a struggle.
Like me, some of us are forced to jump. When you are pushed, you gotta freestyle and sometimes, magically dope things happen. I was a freestyler and I have the many lessons to prove it from mistakes I’ve made. Unless life is one giant rap battle, you don’t need to freestyle your way to success.
Folks are being told to quit their jobs to follow their dreams and live their lives of purpose, but where does the ability to keep your head above water come in? I wasn’t brave when I ventured out to be an entrepreneur. I fought it tooth and nails. I still checked LinkedIn every week for jobs until 2012, because I thought I was crazy to even try to work for myself. Where are my checks coming from? How will I keep up my shoe habit when these direct deposits aren’t coming every 2 weeks? Why don’t I want nice things?
Yet and still, I stuck to it and here I am. I am one of those success stories as a self-starting entrepreneur who no longer has to eat ramen noodles and my bank account isn’t negative. I climbed my way from working for someone else to building my own business. But I am not brave. Why? Because I could afford to fail at pursuing my dream when I did.
The price of failure is one that some of us can afford more than others because we have the privilege to fail without total destruction.
I could take more risks since I didn’t have people depending on the money I earned for shelter, meals and clothing. I didn’t have a family to take care of. And I knew if I ever got broke enough and couldn’t afford to pay my rent, I had people to fall back on.
What I sacrificed as I pursued my dreams was MY comfort, not the lives of other people who looked to me to stay afloat. THAT alone freed me to take more risks, which did pay off in dividends. Having a safety net is an asset that most people do not have.
It is easy to tell people who aspire to do more or different to “take a leap of faith.” If your fall off that cliff also means you crash along with several people who are at your mercy, it’s worth looking down first. The failure that could come with some people’s leaps of faith means they will end up sleeping in cardboard box, or they can’t afford to buy the medication for their kids’ chronic illness, or even their own.
So what should you do before you follow that dream? PLAN.
We hear stories of the people who moved to New York City with $45 in their bank account and they’re now Broadway stars. Or folks going to Paris with nothing but a suitcase of clothes and no money to buy crepes. Now they run some high fashion magazine. For every 1 of those stories, there are 1,000 of those who never climbed their way to the top. The fall to the bottom was hard, unyielding and they have yet to recover from it.
It is sexy to sell aspirations. It’s great to use ourselves as examples. But the idea that everyone should quit the job bringing them steady paychecks today to follow a dream, without adding the element of planning is a disservice.
Let’s not TEDTalk folks into despair and misery pursuing dreams as real life needs are ignored. If you have a dream, create a plan, and stock away. Live below your means. Give yourself a timeline and save. Because dreams are expensive. They are elusive to many because they’re cost-prohibitive.
I’m not trying to be the wet blanket here. Please know that your dreams are valid. My life is proof. My bae Lupita Nyong’o said so too so you know it’s true.
Your dreams are worth pursuing. But your dreams do not have to be pursued at the expense of you losing that bed you dream on.
“Faith without works is dead” right? So these leaps of faiths that we’re spurring people to take without the work are just setting people up to fail.
