Everything I have Learnt About Mental Health
The top 6 takeaways I learned from my experiences
Since COVID-19 started on 31 December 2019, many were forced into lockdown and faced isolation for a long time. Schools were closed and everyone started working from home. The effect of COVID-19 on one’s mental health is obvious.
Some worry about getting sick, and others worry about their jobs and the future of the world post-pandemic. The stress, anxiety, fear, and loneliness can be extremely overwhelming. While the world has gradually learned to ‘live with COVID-19’, the effects of COVID-19 on one’s mental well-being have not faded.
At such tough times, empathy and gratitude can go a long way. I‘ve learned much of my life values from Gary Vaynerchuk and they have continued to serve me well.
Empathy was what encouraged me to join I’m Friendly Co as a mental health listener. For the hurt and vulnerable, having a listening ear could be deeply relieving and alleviate stress and anxiety.
During my time with I’m Friendly Co, I had the delightful pleasure to take part in various workshops and events to learn from mental health experts and psychologists.
Without further ado, let me share my top 6 takeaways from these lessons.
1) The Importance of Building Candor
What is candor? It is the quality of being honest and open. To build trust with the vulnerable, candor is immensely important. If you want someone to feel trusted, you can consider sharing something personal and this would establish a stronger bond between you and the other party.
Likewise, if you are seeking relief from the stress and anxiety of work or personal life, you’d naturally feel much better if you can be open and frank about your thoughts and feelings.
As such, it is certainly beneficial for both the vulnerable and the listener to be candid and keep an open mind.
2) The ‘478’ Breathing Technique
Have you ever felt deeply overwhelmed after a work meeting? Have you been deeply dreading your work on Monday that you can’t fall asleep on Sunday night? If this sounds familiar, try the ‘478’ breathing technique.
The ‘478’ breathing technique was developed by Dr. Andrew Weil and the concept is rather simple.
There are only 3 steps involved
- Breath in deep for 4 seconds
- Hold your breath for 7 seconds
- Exhale slowly over 8 seconds
The name ‘478’ is derived from the duration of your inhaling, holding, and exhaling process — I hope you’d find it easy to remember this breathing technique and also feel much calmer after trying it out!
3) Be Collaborative Instead of Forceful
I once heard a quote.
If you listen to your body when it whispers, you won’t have to hear it scream
For some, it may be their innate nature to work hard and overcome all odds. When they are motivated, they push themselves. When they get tired, they push themselves. When something feels off, they still push themselves.
I don’t blame them. It is human nature (of those who are ambitious). I am very guilty of this as well. However, over the years, I have learned how crucial it is to strike a balance between hard work and wellness.
It is okay to keep your nose to the grindstone, but if you do it for too long, you may soon lose your nose. (I meant it figuratively of course)
Learn to take a break sometime! Be kind to yourself.
4) Get Rid of Ants!!! (No, not that ants, but Automatic Negative Thoughts)
What are automatic negative thoughts? I think many of us have likely experienced this at least once in our life.
“I am not smart enough”, “Bad things will happen”, “I don’t think I am ever going to succeed”. — these are prime examples of negative thoughts. Typing that makes me rather uncomfortable because I have long gotten over such negative thoughts.
I believe it may be difficult to completely destroy all ants (pun intended), but if you fill your life with positivity, I promise you’d find yourself in a much better place.
Instead of “I can’t do it”, think “I can try”. Instead of “I can try”, think “I will do it”. Take it one step at a time, and overwhelm those ants with positivity and love!
5) Understand the Amygdala — An Essential Part of Your Brain that Controls Fear and Anger
For my ‘sciency’ friends, you’d love this one.
I once attended a talk about Scientific Leadership at Google Singapore by Julius Uy. One takeaway that has never left me was the science behind the amygdala. You see, the human mind was never made to perform well under intense situations where we feel stress, fear, or anger.
One part of the human mind which is responsible for crucial cognitive functions such as decision-making and problem-solving— the prefrontal cortex — has a unique relationship with the Amygdala.
In a high-stress environment when the amygdala is active, the prefrontal cortex is “switched off.” — this means that in an environment where fear and anger are present, people are unable to make rational decisions!
It is imperative to learn to calm down and relax during high-intensity periods! Here, the ‘478’ breathing technique may prove helpful!
6) Understanding your Emotions
Even when we are aware of great breathing techniques to calm ourselves down, it is very likely impossible for humans to not experience stress and anxiety at some point in our lives.
Here, I believe everyone will benefit from understanding their emotions.
There is a clear distinction between “I am anger” and “I feel anger”. In the former, you are subconsciously letting anger consume you. You’d find ways to justify any rash actions because you think you’re anger. In the latter, anger is nothing but another feeling that happens to pass by your body and soul.
If you could truly understand this, you’d learn to let go, breath, and calm yourself down when you feel angry. Negative thoughts slowly fade and you’d regain your composure.
This may sound abstract, but think about it! Perhaps it’d come in handy someday!
Conclusion
If you made it all the way here, congratulation! Mental health may not be a topic that everyone is comfortable speaking about, but taking the first step to learn more about it is definitely important for both yourself and whomever you may interact with in the future.
I hope you have found some value in my sharing and feel at least a little more relieved or calmer.
Finally, always remember to always be kind to yourself and others! :)
