Into the Wednesday wonder we go -autism days
The dude slept all night. Me not so much. Do parents really get to start sleeping when they are 18? Owen woke with a start and came running to me. He sat next to me for several minutes in a little ball. I can tell already his sensory needs are high. He is pushing his head into my arm, it is interesting to me how heavy his head feels some days. The morning went fast. Today nothing was pleasing him. He needed me. It is such an inner struggle for me, sit and hold my baby until all of this passes for him or push forward and get ready for our day. I never know, do we ever know. I know this morning my focus was changed. Normally I write a little, play a little, write a little more as he runs off to play, but this morning he needed my full attention. This morning we both cried. He cried because he didn’t want to go to school. I cried because I couldn’t put his sock on properly. And he can’t tell me if the seam is bothering him or he has something in his shoe. I walked around yesterday with something in my shoe. I thought of him all day. Today I cried for yesterday and how his socks affect our lives. I long for his communication. I feel even more sad when he falls and then cries, because I can then tell he understands he is hurt and that he can tell mommy when he is hurt. The guessing is so hard. Today I live for tomorrow. The hope for communication and understanding of his needs. Share you story. Everybody’s got something, someone can relate. Smiles to all and donut daze!