The Grand Tuesday
Our autism journey
Owen slept pretty good last night. Woke at four and got in bed with me. He fell back asleep though, so I’m happy about that. We’ve started our morning routine and my baby can’t sit still. He runs from one side of the room to the other. Back and forth, back and forth, repeating and repeating the same phrases. It’s hard watching him always on the go. He has to move, his body won’t calm. He continues to do all of this with his stimming motions in full effect and make the “eeeeeee” sound. He is watching the shadows as they play off other objects. He yells “turn da lights back on” as he turns the switch on and off. He knows I will tell him to leave them on. He wants the shadows. He needs the reflections. In less than two minutes he has been in ten different parts of the room holding his tablet at different angles to see how the light plays off the different surfaces. He has to do it. He screams with delight, with anger when the light isn’t right and he laughs when he will catch the reflection he wants. All of this is intertwined with watching videos and repeating the words back that are etched in his memory for rote. He gives me a big hug and says “don’t go away”. A line from a commercial for a Disney show. He loves watching the ads, the characters introduce themselves and their shows. He will say “hi I’m” but stops there. I still am trying to know if he completely understand he is Owen. He talks about himself in third person, but will also say “I’m” when he needs to. Maybe “Owen” is only a word. How do you explain all of that to a child. He yells “O’ll be back” and “I’m prowda of ewe”. He shows as many emotions in two minutes as he moved to different locations. And I’m on that rollercoaster with him. His cries of joy bring joy, his cries of anguish bring anguish and his excitement is my high. The journey is ever changing, but yet stays the same. The joy of this journey is watching him grow. There is sadness mixed in, but the smile he gives me sees me through. Together is where the strength lies. Life challenges you, but winning life feels even better. Make today matter. Smiles to all and donut daze!