This Time, Last Year
TW: rape, child molestation
Around this time last year, I was raped by a friend I made during my last few days of high school. Now I probably wouldn’t remember the date exactly if there weren’t posts on my Timehop reminding me where I was a year ago, at the place I was at a year ago. I also wouldn’t be writing this blog entry so openly if it weren’t in light of a few other terrible things that have happened lately that’s relevant to what happened to me last year.
I received news a few weeks ago that someone else that I was close to in high school molested someone in a family I considered my second family. Not only that, but this someone he molested was a child, only turning 10 this year. It was a reoccurring thing between 2012–2017, which I can’t even fathom. This child was only five years old when he began to be sexually assaulted by someone this family thought they could trust. Since then, they have finally caught him and arrested him but as far as I know, there will need to be a trial and such before anything additional is set in stone.
On top of that, I have found out a local 24 year old had sex with a 13 year old, which is statutory rape. I don’t know if it was forced or agreed upon, however a 13 year old definitely can not make the right decision in this case to not have sex with the 24 year old if it was agreed upon. The 24 year old, however, should’ve known better. It’s disgusting, and it’s pedophilia. I’m absolutely horrified that this happened and the investigation is underway as I type this. I don’t personally know the adult in this situation, however I do know the teenager and the whole thing is appalling.
Though my instance of rape isn’t pedophilic in the ways the former two have been, it’s haunting in ways I can’t put into words. That being said, I have no idea how the two children involved in these cases are going to deal with whatever psychological trauma their cases have caused.
The worst part of mine is that I didn’t do anything legally about it. I didn’t file a report like I should have, as a majority of victims don’t due to a lack of trust in the victims. The whole trial process can just add onto the agony you’re already experiencing as you’re healing from the event.
However, I confronted my rapist. I told him what had happened was rape, and he argued with me and said that it wasn’t just because “I consented.” The quick version of the story: I was drinking, was buzzed and said “hey if we have sex for the first time tonight I’ll be okay with it and I’m consenting now while I’m still sober” even though I CLEARLY WASN’T ‘SOBER,’ drank even more while he just watched me get drunk (just to be clear, he wasn’t drinking, he was the sober one), and then had sex with me when I was too drunk to function or to even move or speak right. He blocked me after my accusations, to then I turned to some of my closest friends who was also close with him and confided to them about what happened… come to find out he had done suggestively bad things with them as well. In one case, the two were intoxicated together and he tried to feel her up, and she had to decline him several times including getting stern with him to actually get him to stop. In the other case, the two had gone on a date and he pressured her into making out with him despite declining and telling him she didn’t feel very comfortable with it. My friends confronted him about what he did to me and ended up blocked as well. Seems kind of fishy to block us if he “didn’t do anything wrong.”
The worst part is that these were just two of my friends. Three of us. Who else could he have done this to? And who else is he getting away with doing this to?
All in all, I’m sick of people getting away with this and I am so happy to know that some people are getting the justice they deserve, especially for the sake of the children. Please don’t ever hesitate to get help if you find yourself in a situation of sexual assault, harassment, or rape. You may be what the world needs to stop this person from continuing to hurt others. •
