Thanks for sharing this experience!
I am very curious about psychology topics, although I don’t have any formal education on it.
Abuse is something that I had a very hard time wrapping my mind around, because I always pictured it as something downright violent, obvious. And we can usually scape what is obvious.
So, I wandered why abuse victims didn’t just scape (when possible, of course). I think I understand it a little better now, thanks to you.
And as a consequence, I understand why I feel so damn guilt sometimes when dealing with other people.
Being social is fucking hard.