How Boudoir Photos Increased My Body Confidence

I’ve never really considered myself to have the greatest figure. I was thin in my teens and early 20’s, but I was conditioned to believe that my body wasn’t perfect enough. After I got married, though, I gained a little weight, and once I started having children I gained a lot of weight. I am now about 50 pounds heavier than I was pre-kids, and even then I wouldn’t have minded losing 10 pounds.

My husband constantly insists that I am sexy and beautiful, that he loves my body. I couldn’t ask for someone more complimentary or admiring than him. But it’s hard to internalize those compliments, hard to see myself as sexy and beautiful, when all I see is the number on the tag of my jeans and all the clothes on mannequins and in magazines that don’t suit my body type. (Not to mention the number on the scale, which I do try my hardest to ignore.)

And then some friends of ours told us about a photographer they’d visited, who had taken some absolutely breathtaking nude and almost nude photos of her. Intrigued, we got in touch with him and scheduled a session.

We spent three hours in his garage studio on a Saturday night, just the photographer, my husband, and me. We started off with some sexy poses, mostly nude, and eventually brought in some of the BDSM implements and bondage equipment we had. And some toys. The session became more intimate as my hands were cuffed and chained, and I was photographed in some fairly explicit positions and situations.

The photographer was nothing but professional, and he knew how to bring out the beautiful and sexy in both of us. I was totally comfortable with him, and I had to be, given the vulnerable state I allowed myself to be in.

The results were more stunning than I could have imagined. Seeing my body through someone else’s lens, with someone else’s eye, my self-perception shifted. I looked amazing. Beautiful. Sexy. An object of desire.

© 2016 Madison Barry / Michael Rodriguez Photography (https://www.instagram.com/michaelrodriguezphoto/)

The trouble with nude photos, of course, is that there are few people you can share them with. Unlike your standard family photo shoot, the pictures that we ended up with are mostly for our eyes only. But that’s not important. Because it’s how I see myself that matters most.

I can’t say I love my body more, but I am more confident that other people see me in a much more positive light than I see myself. Eventually that external confidence can become internal confidence. And in the meantime, my husband and I have some sexy, sexy photos to enjoy.