you just want me for my sex n my ability to communicate

Ever have that one person in your past life that you’ve said all this dumb shit around and they totally hold you to that dumb shit to this day?

Or like an old roommate situation that sucked and you just never apologized for the immature nature of your communication?

Or like have you ever kissed someone and you have no idea how they feel about it because you were both drunk and then it never came up?

Or like do you ever listen to Nirvana till your ears bleed and think about that one story your best friend in the 9th grade told you about how he went to this show and he asked the dudes playing to cover Smells Like Teen Spirit and they did and he said it was really awesome but they got a few words wrong and that bothered him and sometimes you’re nervous when you’re about to sing around other people so you think about this and the time you made out with said best friend in the movie theater and you have no idea what movie you saw even though all you two did was talk about movies and, well, music and remember when you tried to be thoughtful and make him a cake but you didn’t know how to make frosting and fucked it up and he wasn’t impressed but still talked to you on the phone later anyways?

— — — — I think run on sentences are in vogue because they are a lot of fun to type. I can pick up the momentum in my head without feeling like I’m ending something. I’m ending something.

I’m beginning something else.

I’m wearing new shoes and they are so sexy and they cut gashes in both my heels and I’ve had bloody socks for a week and no one thinks that means something but me because I didn’t tell them.

I didn’t tell anyone that my pride is in my feet and I remember learning about Achilles after getting wet for the first time. I was wearing an orange t-shirt.

I don’t want to pass around the same information with people.

Where are we going?

Why are we doing this?

We are doing this to love. To love the light cast into a room at 6:30 am and sounds people make and invigorating diversity and backyard tomatoes and written words of people standing up for themselves in the context of the complex ego systems humans create and genuine moments where all of that falls away because we suffer or see someone else suffer.

I found liberation in a dirty word.

Do you mean to silence me?