What Spiders are Teaching Me about Living Life

Last week I finished reading Leadership and the New Science by Margaret Wheatley, and there was a tiny section on spiders that sent me down a most interesting rabbit hole soaking up as much as I could about spiders and their webs.

In the book, Wheatley remarks on the wisdom and resiliency of spiders. When their web is broken, they repair it. They don’t tear it down and start fresh. The system that they have created on their own accord is repaired when damaged. It caught my attention because I kept thinking about how many times I swing in the opposite direction. If something doesn’t work the first time, I have a tendency to want to burn it all to the ground, deem it a massive failure, and sulk for a good long while as I berate myself for all the things I did wrong.

This is not a fun place to be.

Wheatley shared this in the context of larger organizational systems and how we can invite in change to complex systems by opening ourselves up to listen, observe, and make incremental (but powerful!) changes. (In a nutshell, this book is about applying quantum theory to complex systems and organizational management. It’s a fascinating read, and quickly moved to the top of my list!)

But back to spiders.

As I was reading this, I had also been involved in a few different conversations about self-healing and examining what resources we already have within us to heal our bodies, so when I read this, a sincere curiosity was piqued. Because spiders spin their own webs from their own bodies, I knew there was more there for me to uncover… about systems / structure / work, as well as self-healing.

Here’s what I discovered and the reminders I am learning from the life of spiders:

1. We all know this one… they spin their own webs.

Every spider has within it the materials to create their own web. They have developed an efficient structure to catch prey so that they don’t exert excessive energy on chasing down food. Also, the structure of the spider web itself is an engineering marvel. It’s lightweight but enormously strong. There’s a clear formation, but it is immensely flexible.

Reminder to self: As I think about my own structures, within business and life, how can I create systems that are efficient and substantial, without being so rigid they are prone to shattering upon impact?

2. The first step in creating the web is a giant, and patient, leap of faith.

This one is no joke. To begin construction of the web, the spider produces an adhesive thread that they send into the air to be caught by a draft of wind until it attaches to a second fixed point to bridge the gap. It then senses the change in vibration of the thread to confirm adhesion before beginning to crawl to the middle to then hang down, affixing the third point to create a Y-shaped baseline structure.

Reminder to self: Where might I open up to work more collaboratively with nature and my environment? How can I be more patient, as I wait for optimal conditions to take that first step? How might I open up to more trust in knowing that I will feel into when is the right time to make that next move?

3. Many spiders will eat their own web to regenerate protein, which in turn allows them to create more silk to repair their webs.

If you’re picking up what I’m putting down, you’re catching on that spiders are hella resourceful. While they create webs to catch prey as a more efficient way to find food, the act of creating the web is a large energy drain. In order to replenish their reserves, they will often eat their own webs to recycle the silk proteins to allow them to produce more for repairs. So not only are they responsible for creating their own structures, they willingly consume certain parts of their creations for nourishment so that they can continue to fortify it.

Reminder to self: What nourishment am I craving to continue enhancing the structure I have built for myself? Where might I need to recycle resources so that I am able to rebuild areas that have been compromised?

4. Webs are strategically built to attract prey.

I never put much thought into the why and how of spider webs. I have certainly marveled at the creation of some, and most definitely assumed that they were built opportunistically. I thought that a spider wove its web with the hope that an unlucky insect would be caught… at some point. Turns out, spiders weave designs in a much more proactive way to specifically attract their prey. So there’s an intentionality to all that they do. While they rely on trust and nature to co-create with them to build their web, they also aren’t leaving it all up to chance. There’s a dance between having a clear purpose and joyfully surrendering.

Reminder to self: Where do I need to recommit to my purpose? And, how can I use that as a taproot so that I may then invite in a surrendering that yields co-creation? What else do I need in order to feel safe to loosen my grip on expectations and open up to expansive trust?

5. Spiders sense trapped prey through vibrations the web sends upon impact.

While you may have seen some spiders sitting in the middle of their webs, it’s quite risky. By doing so, they open themselves up as prey for birds and larger predators. Because of that, most often, spiders will wait on the outskirts of their webs, away from the eyes of predators, and wait to feel the impact of an insect caught in their web. They feel the impact via vibrations in the web, so they wait until they feel that before taking action.

Reminder to self: Where can I open up to more spaciousness so that when an answer to an inquiry arrives, I’m able to feel the impact? How can I tap into the sensations of my body more to help me move from an embodied place, rather than immediately engaging in the narratives my brain likes to initiate?

My burgeoning interest in spiders comes at a time when it feels really powerful to remind myself of my own innate wisdom and capacity for healing. I say all of this knowing that I am also extremely privileged to have the support of mental health professionals, wise friends, compassionate collaborators, so this is in no way attempting to say that we can do it all on our own.

And yet, how often do we too easily give our power away?

As someone who has struggled with honoring my own value for most of my life, spiders have been a source of sweet medicine for me lately. Should it resonate, may they serve you, too.