Esports and the conflicts in the family
Avoid the conflicts, talk to each other
In Esports and gaming as in all other sports and activities, it can easily turn to conflict in the household. Kids enjoy the game and tend to be very serious about winning and playing. When I teach Esports I am often met with frustrated parents, parents trying to maintain a normal life-style with a gaming child.
Once the computer and the game go into the equation everything seems to change. The parents don’t understand why their kids can’t just stop the game and continue after dinner, or they aren’t going to bed when they should. And the frustration is very relatable, but the solution to the problem is much simpler than the parents realize.
Let’s base this on CS:GO.
Set up rules about gaming with your child, they must ask before they start a ranked match. A match usually takes about 30–45mins but can easily go for a full hour. Expect them to need 60mins to complete the game, that way you can plan dinner and they will have to do something else in the game if a full game can’t be completed.
Why don’t they?
That is actually very simple, but the kids tend not to be very good at explaining this and they get frustrated that their parents don’t understand. And it is this circle we must break.
An online game cannot be paused, once the game has started it will either be completed with them in the game or not. The game will finish no matter what, if they lose they lose rank which is why they want to finish the game.
As it is an online game it is a game with their friends but also people they don’t know. So we have five people somewhere in the world in the game ready to play. So the game will finish no matter what.
If you leave a game that has already started they will be punished for it. The punishment isn’t a simple warning. It might be the first time, but repeat leavers is punished by not being able to play. And this is no joke, they will be banned from playing online with their friends in competitive match making.
There are four levels of punishment.
1. 30 min ban from competitive play.
2. 2 hours ban from competitive play.
3. 24 hours ban from competitive play.
4. 7 days ban from competitive play.
So, on top of loosing rank you can be banned from playing with your friends for a week. So, I think we can all agree it is very easy to understand why the kids get upset when this happens. Imagine you not being allowed to play a game for a week, because your dad cut the power or turned off the internet connection.
I hope this helps families to better handle the conflicts that Esports and gaming might have introduced in the home.
It’s always hard to communicate when speaking two different languages.
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