There is resounding evidence that people can, for instance, increase their IQ; one of the things that we have assumed for so long is something we are innately born with and cannot change.
The Gifts of Growth and Vulnerability
Margaret Gould Stewart

I had a “friend” who used to tell me that my IQ was something I was stuck with forever, and that I was nothing special because of it. This kind of toxic, abusive behavior has no place in my life, or anyone’s, for that matter. That is, until they make room to improve.

Over the past year, I have worked as hard as possible to stay away from such people. I’ve realized that this form of self-care is the most important. Because, as you said:

“Life is about creating yourself.”

And I’ve realized that part of creating yourself is not allowing negativity to do it for you. After all, the only way we learn about ourselves is by learning about others. How can we create ourselves if everyone around us is taking our colored pencils away, not letting us color our lives the way we want? The short answer is: we can’t.

So yes, IQ is something one can change. Self-worth is something one can change. Negativity is something one can change. We are not stuck with anything forever. We create everything. Forever.

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