Why Hermann Hesse’s “Demian” is a must read and re-read novel

So, I recently re-read Demian not that long ago as the inspiration of a Menswear Collection for fashion school. The first time I read it was about 5 years ago and I just knew I’d end up reading it again in the future, so having no idea what to do for my Menswear collection seemed like a great excuse for re-reading it and creating around a topic I love: the self.

Among the many things one could take away from Demian, one of my favorite things to reflect on are the opposing concepts of good and bad, and the way they develop and transform throughout Emil Sinclair’s life journey.

I’ve also been really interesed in the topic of childhood as of lately, so the way the young Sinclair saw the world caught my attention and reminded me of the way I used to see things as a child, where the “light” world was the inside of my family house and school (warm, loving, secure, and religious), while the “dark” world was the outside (sinful, full of tragedies and chaos, out of our control). One would think staying in the “light” world is the normal decision, until we grow up and realize the lines get blurry and sometimes we even find ourselves closer to the “dark” world and further away from the values and principles that we had been taught in the “light” world as kids.

I truly believe part of the purpouse of this novel is to take you back to your childhood and make you question yourself as an adult, of course the lines get blurry sometimes and not everything is as black or white as it can seem to be, but, how come it was so easy to tell right from wrong when we were kids but as adults it’s so hard? How is it that as kids it was so hard for us to lie but as adults it comes so easy for us to tell white lies?

Then we get into Sinclair’s teen and early young adult years (I’m currently at this point of my life), where he’s completely lost and has fallen into the “dark” world, he’s wasting himself and his potential in alcohol and vagrancy out of his demotivation and lack of purpose. Max Demian, who somehow represented spirituality to Sinclair, was no longer around and Emil couldn’t help but think about him and long for him, long for the curiosity and spark his childhood friend used to ignite in him.

I think at this point our lives we all (or at least most of us) experienced some sort of angst that comes with the inevitable question “who am I?” and depending on our character, environment, tendencies and guidance, we all get different results. Our teen and young adult years are so weird and yet so crucial, they could pass us by or become the foundation of the rest of our lives, and while some are single or unemployed, some others are getting married and having kids or starting a succesful career; many of us fall into the wicked game of comparing ourselves with other people’s journeys, we question our love lives and careers and get pushed into questioning them, we also get pushed into questioning ourselves a lot.

I don’t think many people get the right guidance or the right questions for them to find the right answers, we focus so much on what we see that we forget to truly sit down and ask ourselves what we stand for, we confuse “standing up for” with fighting for the enviorenment, being feminists, religious, political, etc., and impose those things as our identity, letting them dictate the way we think and act; we forget that we should stand for ourselves and the right questions to understand ourselves, what we “stand for” should be values, morals, principles, which tend to be greatly subjective.

Allowing external positions and labels dictate who we are and our values is the same as beginning from the end, the positions where we get, the labels we are recognized for and the way we are perceived by others should be a product of the ways we express ourselves (values, morals, traditions, principles, beliefs, etc.) not the other way around.

Sinclair then meets Pistorius, who kind of becomes an esoteric guide for him, a replacement for Demian, yet, Pistorius has in some way lost his motivations as well and lives a not-so-ideal life in the darkness. The way I see it, Pistorius was very wise but lacked the action and spark Max had that made Sinclair miss him. Sinclair ended up taking that knowledge and never went back to the esoteric and meditation “sessions” he had with Pistorius.

I don’t want to make this article any longer, so basically, I truly recommend reading this novel at different stages of your life as it takes you back to past things you might’ve forgotten along the way. It makes you reflect on who you were, and while not many like to look at their past selves and by no means am I saying you should go back to it, our past is what makes us who we are, it’s a part of our essence and by trying to completely forget or neglect it, we lose opportunities of growth, we need to know what we have done right and we have done wrong, what is it that has made us feel full in the past and what is it that has made us feel empty.

The problem is not to look at one’s past, it’s a matter of perspective, of asking oneself “who have I been and who do I want to become?” in the most hopeful and yet objective way possible as to not fall into guilt or regret.

Anyway, these are just some of the thoughts of young woman in her early 20’s who, likes to read and think about life in order to try and make of herself the best version of her she can.

Short note: I’m new to writing and would appreciate any comments, I’d love to know other people’s opinions on the matter, whether you agree or not with what I wrote, I’d like to know and maybe have a nice and respectful chat about it :) Tips and corrections are welcome as well!

Thanks for reading!