Dear Don

Dear Don:

My guess is neither of us thought we’d be in this situation: you, a day away from becoming America’s first president with a past in reality television, and me, a seven pounds heavier version of my November 8, 2016 self (feelings are meant to be eaten), writing a public letter to a steak salesman. Alas, you are there and I am here, and the only question remaining is — what now?

In all seriousness, I’m guessing we’ve shared many similarities over the past two and a half months: a span of emotions spurred by a shocking event, confusion (How close is too close with Russia? Do they receive a notification if I unfollow?), outreach for support (Jeff Sessions, you up? Liquor store, you open?), probably very little sleep (Jeff Sessions WAS up and the liquor store is 24/7) and a bunch of erratic behavior — you, in appointing polarizing people to your cabinet, late night Twitter ranting, and backpedalling on a number of campaign promises (Drain the swamp! Build the wall!), and me, in asking for help writing this article and then sitting on the weight of writing this article for two months, causing an immeasurable amount of stress and the realization that even one day out from your inauguration, I still have both everything and nothing to say.

But that, Donald, is where our similarities end. How we were raised, the way we treat others, and what we believe in (or at least say we believe in) are all major reasons why we do not see eye-to-eye. Back in November, I wrote why I believe America’s differences are what make us great, whereas you ran your entire presidential campaign singling out and insulting many minority groups. Regardless of what your values truly are, it is my hope that you don’t continue the hateful rhetoric or fulfill the misogynistic, xenophobic, racist bigotry you seemed to enjoy during your run for office.

Generalizing is dangerous. I know, factually, that every person who voted for you does not share your values. But as one of my favorite quotes by Elie Wiesel states, “the opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.” When you love someone, you must love their flaws as much as you love their strengths. So by the power of association, your voters accepted your flaws, and your flaws are, ahem, bigly.

What has me and my friends so upset, is that we do not stand for these things you believe in/say/tweet. We are struggling to accept that if you keep many of your campaign promises, that many Americans will lose rights that we (and our predecessors) have fought so hard to secure.

We do not support your hateful rhetoric, but we do support America. And just as we will never condone or incite violence, we will never take a back seat to what is right.

So Donald: meet my army of friends. We are women and men. Democrats and Republicans. We are from big cities and small towns. We represent a multitude of races, ethnicities, sexual orientations and religions. We voted for Hillary Clinton, and we agree with Lin Manuel Miranda — love is love is love is love. Fear may have won the battle, but love will win the war. Like Martin Luther King Jr. so famously said, “the moral arc of the universe is long, but it bends toward justice.” We are millennials, and brace yourself — ’cause we as bendy as hell.

“As a white male, I realize that this election will have little effect on my day to day. My right to my body won’t be infringed upon nor made fodder for those who wish to cause me physical harm. I am blissfully unburdened by those who oppose my religion, skin color or sexual orientation as they will not be emboldened to intimidate or assault me. Nor will my disabilities be mocked for a crowd of the lowest common denominator’s amusement. I am saddened by that realization.

I am also furious that we all missed the obvious path to your ascendancy. We had to realize at some point that you — a man, who has crafted a career by exploiting loopholes — would find a way to exploit the most galling loophole of all; lose the presidency and yet still, inexplicably, manage to come out the victor. I can only hope the loophole you walked through does not become our noose.” — Jeffrey

“While I have, more often than not, voted for candidates from the Democratic Party, I always vote for the individual candidate’s position based on my core beliefs.

Having studied psychology for the majority of my academic career, I understand the empowerment that comes from having a strong, competent, relatable leader. POTUS must be a person worthy of respect from the constituents of America but, just as importantly, from the people and leaders of the world, who look to solidify international relations with the great superpower that is the USA. The reason to have these qualities in POTUS draws back to the psychological concept of group dynamics and social psychology. The (sometimes frightening) power of the group mindset and power of the leader has been demonstrated in laboratories (i.e., the Milgram experiment, the Stanford Prison experiment and the Asch conformity experiment) but, more importantly, in some of the most horrific events to have occurred in the last century: Hitler’s Nazi Regime, the Rwandan Genocide and South Africa’s apartheid. These events occurred because of pressure applied to the people by an unethical, uncontrollable leadership and, eventually, by each other. But, there’s another aspect of group dynamics: when a strong, competent, relatable leader is in charge, incredible change can occur. The most obvious examples here are Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela and Mahatma Gandhi, whose respectful demeanor encouraged a vast group following, the majority of which acted in peaceful protest and ultimately inflicted huge change. So, when I entered the voting booth, I voted for the person who I believed would embody the most important traits needed in a successful, ethical, intelligent POTUS.

I also voted based on my moral foundation. I am fortunate to have been raised by kind people who told me I could be whatever I wanted to be, and to be surrounded by friends of different religions, ethnicities, sexuality… a melting pot that undoubtedly exposed me to the belief that I currently hold: why shouldn’t everyone have access to the opportunities America has to offer? Who am I to pick who should receive these opportunities and who does not? Who could possibly believe that it is in their right to dictate the opportunities of a person that is not themselves?” — Brielle

“I’m a Republican, and I’m usually proud of it. While it disappointed me to vote against my party, which was represented by a man I could in no good conscience (or even unconscious) condone, I have been even more saddened to see the resulting splintering effects on the people of this country. People I know and people I respect have stooped to your level by reacting rashly, insensitively, offensively, and even violently. One question I have for you and your administration that can’t be solved with a law or a wall: how do you plan to (re)unite the country around a president that has inspired such powerful emotion on each side, when your supporters and opposers aren’t even acting respectfully toward one another?” –Meredith

“As a gay man living in this country, just months ago, I would have said that I felt safe, united, loved. Assessing my feelings now, I would have to say that I feel scared, hopeless, and nauseous.

Sitting there watching the final poll numbers come in and realizing that the most qualified human being to be the next Commander in Chief was not winning this race was a gut wrenching and surreal experience. I was not voting for Hillary Clinton because she was a woman and I was ready to see the glass ceiling break or because she looked great in a pantsuit. I was voting for her because she was qualified, experienced, loving, and she wanted the best for ALL.

You on the other hand, throughout your entire campaign, have made racist comments and have only appealed to the redneck nation that is live in this country. How can you speak to women in the manor that you do? How can you believe that marriage equality is not a constitutional right and that the States will gain power to decide who should be allowed to love equally when you are President?

As the popular vote showed, we wanted the most qualified person to be our next President and that person was Hillary Clinton.” — Jared

“I’m a teaching artist in New York City and I need some help. What do I tell my pre-teen and teenage students who are female about their president elect? When they ask me why it is they will be governed by someone who speaks proudly and openly about sexually assaulting them — what do I say?” — Steven

“Your election as president, for me, has opened the flood gates of all of the suppressed racism that America believed would never resurface. Throughout your entire campaign, we’ve seen it pick up steam — from fights at your rallies, to Klansmen holding rallies for you, to black people being physically assaulted in the streets by your supporters.

What this presidency means to me, is that America is now at a crossroads. All of the “color blind” people now have a responsibility to lift those goggles and see what is so blatantly clear in front of them. There have been people receiving death threats, Muslims who are afraid of wearing their hijab because they don’t want to get assaulted, KKK celebrations all over the country, and a slew of racist graffiti, vandalism, and internet trolls who now believe it’s ok to tell black people to ‘go back to Africa’, or a Muslim woman that she’s a member of ISIS, or to tell a Mexican immigrant that they’re not welcome here.

Your America is not my America, but it is a reflection of American history. Historically, after any period of black progress, there is always a period of white regression. After reconstruction there was Jim Crow, after Civil Rights there was the “war on drugs” that led to the mass incarceration epidemic that we are plagued with now, and after eight years of America’s first MIXED RACE president (I like to make that distinction because Barack is as much white as he is black), disenfranchised white Americans have come out in droves to support a man who is openly racist, sexist, and unqualified, because of the fear of any more black, Muslim, Asian, or Latino progress. Your America terrifies me everyday.

I no longer feel safe in this country; I always wonder, “Well, what if this guy is some crazy Trump supporter? What if he tries to hurt me?” No one should have to walk around in constant fear in a country that prides itself on being the “land of the free and the home of the brave.” There is nothing brave about a country full of cowards who are so afraid of the “other” and so steadfast in an ideology that existed hundreds of years ago, that they would elect someone who is openly hated not only by the majority of the country, but internationally as well. Nothing good can come of your presidency.” — Makisa

Me and my friends are fueled by injustice, and we represent the greater good. And you better believe that there are more of us than there are of you (just check the popular vote). This country is flooded with friend groups like mine and what we believe, we live.

Colin Jost once quipped as a part of SNL’s Weekend Update, “I know that this seems like a huge step backwards for our country, but we have to remember that progress isn’t a straight line upwards. It’s a roller-coaster where sometimes you’re screaming for joy and other times you’re barfing in your own face.” Four years of face-barf seems less-than-pleasant, but as Margaret Thatcher said, “you may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.”

Donald, you may not be my president or our president, but on Friday afternoon, you will be the president. Instead of wishing for you to fail, I wish for you to open your mind. The majority of Americans, even those who voted for you, were not brought into the world with the privilege you were. What fun would America be if all of its citizens were white cisgender males with trust funds and nuclear families? Literally 0 fun. Zero.

I cannot speak for my friends, but I am going into this administration with the same spirit I approach most of life — low expectations and a forecast to fight for what is right. But I empower you — prove us all wrong. While I don’t know what’s in store, at least I know I’m in good company.

Sincerely,
Mandy