I didn’t sleep alone, my son lay in his father’s dented mattress space. My fear subsided as his breathing slowed to a blissful rhythm. The drugs only help so much.

Could I know the true depth of this moment? Do our life’s shadows expose hidden light? Would I comprehend motherhood’s fullness, without my mother being stripped from my childhood?

I am loved fearlessly with unconditional reckless abandon. I recognize a child’s need to belong, be loved, nurtured and valued. I know it, for it’s me. I celebrate knowing, I need not sleep alone.