Maybe we can dismiss Priya’s desire to have a “Scott and Zelda” relationship as one of the main flaws in her thinking. Scott Fitzgerald was a raging alcoholic, and Zelda diagnosed, at one point, as schizophrenic; “their marriage was plagued by wild drinking, infidelity and bitter recriminations” according to Wikipedia.
Tinder might be part of the problem: a way to optimize spontaniety. Being in a relationship is exactly the opposite: a way to negotiate the boring bits of everyday life, to negotiate differences between you and the other. A lot of people fail at this task. Priya’s adolescent fixation on charm, fun, spontaneity, and a mysterious absence of conflict seems doomed to failure.
Write us after your fourth marriage; tell us what you’ve learned.