As someone who has read The Billfold since its inception, I’m honestly shocked to see something so flip and insensitive written here.
I understand the point of your post, insecurity at work, imposter syndrome, and how it is much more stressful when you don’t receive any feedback. But that is NOT gaslighting. None of what you mentioned is gaslighting. As someone who was in an extremely abusive relationship for years, in which gaslighting was a big factor, I’m hurt to see it used in such a cavalier and joking way. Actual gaslighting makes you feel like you are going insane, like I-should-be-locked-up-because-I’m-clearly-having-a-psychotic-break-and-no-longer-have-any-sense-of-reality insane. It is so much more than self-doubt or feelings of insecurity and it can take years to undo the damage it creates. It’s also a big reason why people stay in abusive situations, you can no longer trust your own mind to know what is happening in the world around you.
As I said before, I understand and even agree with most of this post. I think it’s important to talk about workplace insecurities! But I’d just ask that we be sensitive to people who have actually suffered through this abuse tactic and not trivialize the term into meaning something, while not fun, normal that everyone experiences.