8 CHARACTERISTICS OF PROUD PEOPLE

First of all, it is important to define what we mean by being a proud person. In summary, we could say that pride can lead people to show an “excess” of self-esteem. This is linked to arrogant, arrogant and haughty attitudes, which often appear as a defensive shield in people who have suffered in their past.

Thus, those who act guided by pride often have difficulty recognizing their mistakes and retracting them. This becomes a major flaw, as it significantly complicates the relationship with other people. Dealing with proud people can be a difficult and even maddening task. Therefore, it is important to identify when we are faced with someone with this tendency to be able to establish limits in time. Next, we will discuss some characteristics of proud people.

1. They tend to deceive themselves

Self-deception is a tool frequently used by proud people. With it, the individual manages to protect himself from the aspects of himself and reality that he dislikes. Thus, it builds a vision of things distorted and far from reality. By deceiving themselves, proud people may feel able to do things that are actually beyond their ability, overvaluing their abilities.

2. They don’t resolve conflicts, they “win” them

Proud people do not try to seek conciliation with others when friction and conflicts appear. On the contrary, they seek to “win”, since they see these situations as battles in which they must be right. This makes assertiveness conspicuous by its absence and problems with partner, friends and family are frequent.

3. They don’t apologize when appropriate

In line with the above, proud people do not apologize when it plays. Instead, they maintain a rigid posture that prevents them from recognizing what they may have done wrong. They are convinced that it is the other who is responsible for what happens and wait sitting for him to be the one who takes the step of asking for forgiveness. This often causes their relationships to be seriously damaged, because they fail to give their arm to twist and repair the damage caused to others. The most they can do is justify themselves with arguments of all kinds, giving rise to a half-hearted apology.

4. They frequently recall their achievements and qualities

Proud people want to maintain a perfect self-image. This makes them frequently flaunt their achievements and qualities. Sometimes, they can resort to stories from the past to reaffirm themselves in the present, always trying to divert conversations towards everything they have done or do well, what they have achieved, etc.

5. They have a hard time asking for help

Proud people have a certain superhero complex, that is, they believe they are capable of anything. They firmly believe that they do not need others at all and this superiority prevents them from asking for help despite needing it. For them, this would be something like a gesture of weakness or little personal worth. In some cases, they may even be offended when someone offers to lend them a hand.

6. They are unsafe

It is often assumed that proud people are delighted to meet each other. However, many times this behavior appears precisely as a way to compensate for fears and insecurities. Those who have suffered painful experiences in the past can use self-glorification as a way to protect themselves and create invisible armor from harm.

7. They adopt a dominant attitude

Proud people may adopt a domineering attitude that makes relationships with loved ones difficult. Pride leads them to act according to their criteria, ignoring others. They do things as they see fit and impose their way of thinking. They do not tolerate the existence of other points of view or, failing that, undervalue them. At work they can act as authoritarian leaders, because they assume that their skills are close to perfection and others can hardly match them.

8. They need continued social approval

Everyone gets enjoyment of social approval. However, for someone proud this is the most precious commodity. Pride leads them to urgently need others to approve what they say and do, since with this their image of superiority expands even more. This can lead them to show off, showing their qualities, achievements and attributes to others in order to achieve admiration. The problem is that many times this behavior awakens a response of rejection in others, who see in the proud person someone conceited and arrogant.

How to act before a proud person?

If all the characteristics we have discussed remind you of someone in your environment, you may be wondering what is the appropriate way to act. Although there is no magic formula, some recommendations can help.

• Appreciate also their qualities: Yes, pride is a defect. However, it is also not fair to define a whole person based on one of their weak points. Think about other qualities that person has and what it brings to you positively. We all have things to improve, and recognizing the good also helps us treat that person with more patience and affection.
• Set limits: If that proud person hurts you with their behavior, it is important that you can express how they make you feel assertively. Let him know that it hurts you not to apologize or acknowledge his mistakes and propose to find ways to find common ground to resolve the situation. If that person is not open to change or improve, perhaps you should consider taking distance as much as possible.
• Try to understand the reason for that person’s behavior: This does not mean that you should justify what you do or overlook it. However, it can help to contextualize what is happening and understand what past history the person has that may be influencing their current behavior.
• Accept that you cannot change that person: This point is very important, because many times we act as saviors who seek to free others from what they are or what happens to them. While we can help that person improve in some ways, it is impossible to change their entire way of being. Trying to do it is a guarantee of frustration, since only she is the one who can do it if she puts her mind firmly to it.
• Point out what’s bothering you in the moment: It’s important to note the importance of pointing out what’s bothering us about the other in the moment. Keeping inside what hurts us and spitting it abruptly when time has passed will only serve to make the proud person receive the message even worse and position himself as a victim. Assertiveness at the moment it touches is key to be able to modify certain behaviors that bother us.

Conclusions

In this article we have talked about the most common characteristics of proud people. Pride is an emotion that can vary in its connotation depending on the context. When it becomes something negative is when it makes people act from arrogance, ego, arrogance, etc. Dealing with proud people in our environment is not easy, because it is a way of being related to some problematic characteristics.

Among them we highlight the need for social approval, the dominant and controlling character, the tendency to self-deception, seeking to win conflicts, having difficulty apologizing and being assertive and not asking for help from others when needed. Added to this, pride often acts as a protective shield in people who have suffered a lot in the past, thus compensating for some insecurity or feeling of inferiority. Pride can also make people behave somewhat burdensomely, as they do not hesitate to continually remind others of their achievements and qualities.

When someone in our environment behaves this way, it is important that we accept that it is not our responsibility to change them. It is also key to set limits and be assertive, as well as understand the context and life history that may have led the person to act in that way. Instead of accumulating inside what hurts us, it is important to point out what bothers us about the other in the moment, so that he can decide if he wants to change it or not. In the latter case, we will have to consider taking distance to take care of ourselves and protect ourselves.