Why Most People Are The Walking Dead

Living vs. Existing

“woman reaching her arms on camera” by Alex Iby on Unsplash

We’re all so scared of ourselves.

That we can’t stand being lonely, for fear that the darkness inside us comes up and consumes us.

We’re so scared to find out that we all have messed up thoughts and fantasies. That broken dreams, rejections and broken parts are inside of us.

Feeling like we’re the only ones who are scared. Who feel depressed. Who feel abandoned.

So we “fit in”.

We fit in with others to avoid standing out and having others comment on how messed up we are.

We fit in because it’s better than being lonely and sitting down with our true selves.

This is why Oscar Wilde said, “to live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”

Most of us dedicate our lives to being normal. To just being another person in this or that group. Nobody dedicates the time to be themselves. To live. And not just exist.

Yet, it’s not our fault.

It’s not our fault that we want to feel welcomed. Nurtured. Valued. Appreciated for who we are. Everybody just wants to be heard, everybody just wants a lover.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting attention and getting others to celebrate your wins and success. There’s nothing wrong with wanting happiness.

But fitting in is not the right way to do it.

It may have worked back when we were hunters and gatherers since we were more focused on finding the next meal as opposed to being ourselves.

Yet if you want to fit in then you have to do it in a way that stays true to yourself: hang with people who are like yourself.

Sure, you may never find someone who is 100% like you, (thank God, or else that would be very annoying) but you can always find those who are similar enough to you in areas that matter.

People who love the same as you. Who pray the same as you. Who read similar books as you. Or even people who have the same mentality as you and are always looking to make themselves uncomfortable by hanging out with people who are different from them.

So don’t mind the fear of being alive, all of us are scared of living anyways. What matters is that you are not just existing, but living a life that’s as close as possible to who you are.


Comments and feedback are welcomed below. Whether you want to clap or not is up to you. It’s your choice what you want to do with this post.

Marcelo S.L. Fernandes

Written by

Teaching people how to become more attractive from the inside out | marceloslfernandes.com | Say hi via marcelofsamuel(at)gmail (dot)com

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