Summer Bucket List For The Last Year Of Your 20s

Margaux Poupard
Jul 24, 2017 · 2 min read
Twitter/Credit: @scorpiorsars

The twilight of your 20s, specifically 29, can truly give one pause. And if you’re anything like Carole Radziwill of Real Housewives fame, you may even question how many good summers you have left. But bless the overzealous teen who left their summer ’17 hopes and dreams on the floor in a Pittsburgh Urban Outfitters dressing room (where most people’s dreams go to die anyway) for you have inspired many to attempt to live THEIR best summer. Specifically for those in the last summer of their twenties, this is their summer ’17 bucket list:

Purge every belonging you manage to still have from exes; openly question how this shit survived multiple moves, dozens of roommates, and is somehow still hanging on. Deem the items haunted, light them all on fire, have an Angela Bassett-Waiting to Exhale moment.

Eat mushrooms. Not, like, of the oyster or maitake variety, even though those are the best mushrooms, but like, the drug ones. Seriously, why is so hard to buy drugs that aren’t marijuana or coke once you’re over 25?

Take a break from social media so you can later brag how refreshing it was to take a break from ‘being plugged in’.

Get a mani-pedi at a salon that requires an appointment, and isn’t soley cash only.

Attempt to watch less TV by checking out a bunch of books from the library only to end up watching old episodes of Vanderpump Rules instead.

Stay out till 2am just to prove you still can.

Finally hang up the art you bought two years ago when you wanted your living room look less like a ramshackle dorm room that possibly has mold, and more like a place where humans could actually sit on the couch without fear of contracting an STD.

Go to an outdoor movie, get wine-drunk, and complain about how shitty the sound is.

Threaten to cancel your cable, but then remember basketball season will return in a few months, and you’re too nearsighted and irritable to watch games in a bar anymore.

Attend at least two birthday parties, even if it’s on a Friday night, and you’re really tired from the week and life in general.

Learn Nicki Minaj’s “Anaconda”, and act casual about knowing all the words at karaoke night later.

Try to make a craft project from IG/Pinterest, get frustrated halfway through, and buy something from an Etsy store instead.

Film an Insta-Story sober.

Eat a bunch of edibles and hit some DILFs at Dolores Park.

Manage to not misplace your expensive, prescription sunglasses during bottomless mimosa brunch.

Lie about your age with reckless abandon to people you meet at bars.

Enjoy stone fruit season.

Have sex without the tv on.

Even out your foot tan.

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade