Dating: No Chill, All Sinatra
This morning, I drive to work and imagine Frank Sinatra banging on his coffin lid, begging to walk the streets and remind the world that romance, admitted captivation, and proclamations are far more sexy than this “chill” has ever been. Call me old fashioned.
2,316 miles away, my best friend Ashley finds a way to put this spiral of emotions at ease. Which, you can assume with the title of this post and my introductory thought, is no simple feat. She heard the most of it; my concerns of over-energized emotions and how the current dating model seems to reject such passion.
In response to my ranting, Ashley introduces me to an article she uses as a safe haven to discredit chill. So, thankfully, I received validation that I’m not the only one.
I won’t spend this time summarizing the article (that’s what the link is for), or angrily shaking my fist full of rose petals at the world for having encouraged a mentality of apathy. This isn’t a cry for help, or a manifesto.
Rather, a reminder to myself and those like me that passion is a beautiful misery that few allow themselves to endure. That this profound lack of chill is of virtue, not hindrance. My desire to show warmth and curiosity over a careless cold shoulder is what makes me a true romantic. I am a painfully passionate person (points for alliteration) in regards to my work, interests, friendships, and family; why limit myself in my love life due to an expectation set by those who would rather not show they care? After all, they don’t care, or at least would rather hold a poker face as if they don’t.
For the record, I don’t discredit those who have authentic chill. If we’re close, and you do, know that I will occasionally prod you for an emotion of sorts to make sure I’m really bonding with a human and not a shell; but you’re entitled to whatever emotions you have or don’t have, show or don’t show.
Personally, I’d rather be transparent with my emotions. Heart on sleeve and damn proud of it. Sure, it’s had several lashings; but scars tell fascinating stories. I choose to be an open book.
Although I must admit, putting this out into the world has me questioning myself. I have no chill, this is truth, but am I being reckless? Maybe.
Overthinking by considering deleting this post, and trying to have chill? Definitely.
But here it is.
Hopefully, Frank, the best is yet to come.